Worshipping Together as a Family in Church
This was an excellent read by John and Noel Piper on worshipping together as a family in church. I would only disagree with the section that children need to wait until they are 4 to be in the service. Why not begin from birth?
This is why we have regular family devotions and then Kathrynne has "training time" everyday. My husband and I feel that church should not be the training time for little ones, they should be learning to sit still and listen at home.
Hat-tip: MXU
This is why we have regular family devotions and then Kathrynne has "training time" everyday. My husband and I feel that church should not be the training time for little ones, they should be learning to sit still and listen at home.
Hat-tip: MXU
posted by Crystal Paine at 4:21 PM
13 Comments:
My comments farther down your blog on Nurseries fit better here. ::sigh:: some day I'll get these blog things figured out.
I'm really torn with the nursery thing. I was determined not to put my child in the nursery because I wanted to teach my son early, just like Crystal. However, my son is so disruptive right now. He yells out and babbles a lot. There is a crying room with a mirror so you can see and hear the service but I rarely am able to concentrate on it. Usually, I don't get to sing with the congregation either. I did put my son in the nursery and he cryed and I felt horrible. However, the next Sunday he was fine. (My son is 1 BTW.) I definately think that people abuse the nurseries now. There is a 4 yr old in our nursery and she doesn't need to be there. She should be able to sit in the service. I know that I will not put my son in the nursery this winter because it is a great place for germs and I don't want him to get sick. But, I am grateful that I was able to worship in church a few times this summer.
Oh, this is a little off the subject. If any of you parents have sick kids, PLEASE keep them home from church. My sister's kids have been sick all summer because she brings them to Sunday School and the people at her church think it is good to bring kids to church whether they are sick or not. Her youngest has been very ill because of this.
-Zan
Crystal,
You might explain how you do your "training time" at home! I totally agree with you! It can be done. It's always sad to me to see moms have to fight with their little ones at church or in any place where quietness is appropriate.
Bessie
ah, that's what the HT stands for in other blog posts. I never caught that.
I have all three of my boys by my side in church each week. They are 5, 2, and 1yr old. 5 yr old is expected to try to sing with us and pray during worship. He has his own Bible, and is expected to sit quietly and pay attention during the sermon.
2yr old is expected to be quiet, and no too wiggly. He has a children's Bible that he gets to look at only during the sermon. During worship he is expected to stand with us.
1 yr old is held during worship, and sits on my lap during the sermon. He looks at books on my lap.
I would never put my child(ren) in the nursery or Sunday School now that I know some of the things that do go on in there. Perhaps you don't want to hear details, but get my drift.....satan loves to come to church too. Let your mind recollect some of the problems the Catholics have had recently.....it does happen and more often than you think or want to admit.
Back in the "old" days, the family worshiped together or sometimes it was just the men (Jewish type thing). Not every mother went to the Temple either. They had Sabbath in their own homes. Think of Hannah and Samuel. She didn't go to the Temple for a while after Samuel was born.
Here is something I have learned too: We aren't to count on the church to have a wonderful "worship" service or sermon. Fellowship is great and so is singing and learning - don't get me wrong - but as mothers we are first and foremost in charge of our little ones and if that means you and the baby get to stay in the nursery, oh well. If that means you have to sit with a squirmy little one and stand outside the doors in the hallway swaying back and forth until you think you are going to drop over, oh well.
You are the only protective covering for that child, not some warm body that was begged into volunteering in the nursery that Sunday. Don't compromise - God doesn't turn you over to someone else on Sunday. :-)
When hubby and I were going to a "traditional church" (we home church now), our daughter never went in the nursery. It made those ladies upset at times that we didn't leave her in there, but we felt that she should stay with us. We even sat in the very front row. She usually fell asleep in one of our arms up until the preaching started. When she got a bit older (around 5 months), she got a bit squirmy ... but if she wouldn't stay still, to keep from people's attention from being taken off the preacher, I would take her out in the foyer. There, we could still hear the sermon ... and even watch it through the windows in the doors. Even then, the ladies would try to convince me to put her in nursery. But I never did. Only time she ever went in there was to change her diaper, get her bottles, or talk to someone that was in there before/after service.
Oops, sorry. that above anon comment was me. forgot to sign in.
One other thing that we do in church is take turns sitting in the quiet room when my child acts up. Every other Sunday I'm responsible for my son and the other Sun. my husband takes him. It has helped me a lot. I believe that husbands should be just as responsible for the children during the service as the wives. Unless, ofcourse, your husband is a teaching elder. One thing I found out about nurseries is that it is a rather new thing for churches to have. The Roman Catholics do not have nurseries. (I found this info out from some former RC's that go to our church. There is a lot of pressure at our church to keep kids quiet. I wish the elder population would cut mom's a little slack, when it comes to crying babies. It is very stressful having noisy babies in service. Especially when people are looking at you. I was raised in a conservative presbyterian church and we didn't have a nursery. Now I go to a Baptist church and they do have one. The women who volunteer are very good with the babies and godly women. I was wondering if the nurseries are more a Baptist thing.
-Zan
Many interesting comments so far. I'll just say that I have a 5 month old daughter. i put her in nursery. i dont like when other peoples children disrupt church and keep me from concentrating. very rude i think. so, i put my darling in nursery. granted, there's only 3 young ones in there with her. but i DO keep her home when sick (a concern someone else brought up). she has bronchitis right now and i wouldnt dare have her around other babies.
I'm in a baptist church. We don't have a nursery but there is only one child. She's four and sits with her parents. She is very well behaved and we don't even notice she is there. She is learning how to sing with everyone else now and it so sweet to hear her voice.
There is also an infant who comes with his grandparents. He sleeps through the service. If he does cry one of them takes him to the cry room. It has a mirrored window so the parent/gaurdian can see out and we have a baby monitor set up so they can still hear the sermon too.
I think even if we had more than one child our church still wouldn't have a nursery or seperate children's church. He believes that the family should worship all together.
I'm Eastern Orthodox and our services last between 1.5-2 hours on a regular Sunday. My small parish of 120 does not have a nursery that every child goes into, although we do have a nursery downstairs with a speaker that a parent can take a really unruly child into (attached is a room for breastfeeding). Our priest (an older gentleman of 67-68) totally loves children and places a great deal of emphasis on them. When someone's child is getting a little vocal during the sermon (which usually goes about 20 minutes) and begins to take the child out, Fr. will tell them NOT to! He calls it "holy noise." :-)
Taking care of the children during services is a communal thing. If a family has a larger number of children, or may two very squirmy small ones, often the child's godparent or a another well-known adult will take the child from the parent. The child often quiets down this way. Being single, I get my baby fix this way! ;-)
We have 5 children and we keep them all in service with us. They are 2,3,4,5, and 8. We have nightly Bible reading at home and this is the time we use to train the children to sit quietly. The only one we have ever had problems with is our 2 year old. He occasionally gets grumpy and I take him out of the church and into the bathroom where he must sit. He does not get to play if we have to leave the service he has to sit and be ignored until he calms down so I can take him back in. I have daily Bible reading, worship and prayer time during the week. I like to hear the sermon but if I miss part of it in ministering to my family then I know God will feed me what I need during the week. Hubby and I searched and searched the scriptures and the only thing we could come up with regarding children in assembly was that they were there. The Bible does not mention children seperating from thier parents during worship. Believe me when I tell you our contemporary church has no clue why we do the things we do.. "Its just not done!" We just smile and ask them for scripture and verse on taking our children to the nursery.
Julie
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