Trusting God and Infertility - Part 3
My mom was one of 14 children, and my dad was one of 5. I was the oldest of 5 children, and my parents were foster parents for 20 years, so I was always around children - lots of them. My parents had big hearts for children, especially hurting children. Some families raise their kids to become bankers or lawyers. I believed I was raised to be a mom. I wanted a big family, and I wanted to adopt. My dream was to give birth to 4 children and then start adopting. I wanted 12 kids, and I'm not exaggerating.
My husband knew from the very beginning of our relationship that I wanted a big family. He never exactly agreed to 12, but he also wanted a family and said we would start and see what happened after that.
We married in August 1997. It is now November 2005, and we have been trying to conceive for more than 7 years. I have never been pregnant, and we have no diagnosed medical reason for our inability to conceive. We have chosen not to pursue infertility treatments.
For several years, we have been actively discussing and pursuing adoption. Due to the consequences of a tragic auto accident, we are unable to proceed with adoption for at least one more year, possibly longer.
Almost every day we discuss our future with our children, even though we have no idea who they will be or how they will come home to us. We want to adopt children that are waiting in the U.S. foster care system up to age 7 or so. We have researched numerous special needs and attachment issues. We have researched the effects of abuse and neglect. We have discussed the pros and cons of adopting one child at a time or adopting a sibling group. We know more about a multitude of parenting issues than most of our friends who are parents.
We pray for our children. We plan for our children. We dream of our children. We grieve for our children. We hope for our children.
Someday, we will hold our children in our arms and tuck them into bed and kiss them goodnight. -M. A.
posted by Crystal Paine at 11:17 AM
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