Fictional Characters: To Wear or Not to Wear?
I am interested in the reasoning behind not letting your daughter wear clothing with a fictional character on them...does this also extend to cartoon pictures eg teddy bears etc that are not an established character, but more generic. Also what about toys that are characters, like winnie-the-pooh toys or more generic dolls and bears etc? -Anon.
Could you explain how you came to your decision about not having Kathryn wear fictional characters? I'm curious as to your reasons, rationale, etc. Also, does this mean you don't read her fictional stories? -Anon.
Well, I got a number of questions on my statement that we have decided not to allow our daughter to wear fictional characters on clothing. I guess I didn't realize this was so abnormal. But, since I've been asked, I'm happy to share our personal reasoning behind this. It might not make much sense, but our rationale is this: We've already decided to not allow her to watch cartoons, so why would we want her to wear them on her clothing?
For those of you who may wonder why we don't allow her to watch cartoons: I got plenty of exposure to cartoons and other childrens' TV shows/movies while I was babysitting in my late teen years and early married life. Not only did see the results from an entertainment-overloaded childhood, I was bothered by many of the attitudes and underlying messages which were on these TV shows and movies. None of them were from a Christian perspective and they were not conveying Biblical values to these young children. Maybe some of it seemed harmless, but was it best?
I would rather raise Kathrynne with a great emphasis on what is true. There are plenty of real stories and books with real or realistic pictures. That said, I am not completely opposed to fiction -- I'll probably read her some of the well-known wholesome classics. (She and I have already read through the complete original Pilgrim's Progress -- not fiction, but an allegory.) I also don't have a problem with realistic toys (baby dolls, etc.). She already loves dolls and teddy bears and cuddles them and holds them and tries to give them her pacifier. She already has such a motherly instinct and how that warms my heart!
posted by Crystal Paine at 1:22 PM
25 Comments:
I agree with you fully, Crystal. Personally I think that clothing with cartoon characters just doesn't look nice, but I also don't like the message it sends. Why should I give free advertising to a cartoon that I would never let my children watch anyway?
That said, I would allow my children (and keep in mind I don't actually HAVE any children, not married either, just thinking in terms of "someday") to have dolls (not Barbies!) and stuffed animals (but not cartoon characters!) to love and practice caring for. Toys should always have "learning" in mind.
You know, I never really had a firm conviction about it...but I've always seemed to stay away from those sorts of clothes again. Many are so obnoxious! (Makes me think back to the Tweety Bird crazy in the ‘90’s--UGH!)
The one thing that Katie does wear often is a dress with a Minnie Mouse face embroidered on the bottom. That's mostly due to the fact that Daddy works with Disney comics. And what I like about the design is that it's a Minnie from the 1920's. Very cute.
So, yes...I've sort of thought about this, but I'm not too radical about it. I've often thought that it's funny--even if she were to wear some of these things, she'd have no idea who these characters were anyway! "It's just a bear. Who's Pooh?" ;) LOL!
... my reasoning in this regard for my children someday: fictional chracters on clothes are just plain tacky.
We don't do character clothing either. Some strawberry shortcake has snuck in though....
Our reason was purely that it just doesn't look as nice. It seems like most character clothing is poorly made and fits weird. I love classics on my kids, and I need things to last from child to child.
Crystal, we never wore fictional characters on our clothing but I don't think it was a strong conviction for my parents but more they just did not like them on our clothes or the message they would send. We never watch cartons except the very first Mickey Mouse shows on VHS and my mother read Winnie the Pooh to all of us so my younger siblings would not know who characters were any way:). But I too baby-sit and was surprised at the message the shows would send they all boiled to a self message not helping others. I am very glad my parents decided long ago to not allow their children to watch TV or cartons and to spend their time more wisely. As a result they now have an eleven piece band that plays any thing from classical to country and gospel. Our instruments range from violin, viola, cello, bass, guitar, dobro, banjo, mandolin, piano, recorders, drums:). We have had have people out of the blue ask us if we have a TV, because we could never get all that we do and watch as TV as the average person does. It is just more satisfying to see people’s happy face after we have played for then the black screen when the TV finishes:).
Marissa,
Allegory, by definition, fits under the umbrella of fiction writing. Although the story may represent ideas and/or principles; it is still a created story - not actual fact.
Allegory (from dictionary.com):
1)The representation of abstract ideas or principles by characters, figures, or events in narrative, dramatic, or pictorial form.
2) A story, picture, or play employing such representation. John Bunyan's Pilgrim's Progress and Herman Melville's Moby Dick are allegories.
Secondly, I believe that creativity and imagination are vital forces within our families, churches, and the larger society. I agree with you, Crystal, that non-fiction is extremely valuable (there is much to learn from realism in written word); but you can't arbitrarily hack off make-believe and fancy. I would say that there is as much to learn from fiction as from non-fiction. Allegory is a prime example, but there are so many other fictional stories that are extraordinary; emotionally involving and thought provoking. L.M. Montgomery, C.S. Lewis, A.A. Milne, J.K. Rowling, Lewis Carroll, Madeleine L'Engle, J.R.R. Tolkien, Charlotte Bronte, Jane Austen, Louisa May Alcott, Shusaku Endo, Frances Hodgson Burnett, Isak Dineson, Beatrix Potter. I'm a better person because of what I've read.
ShawnaKathleen: Thanks for your comment. Maybe I need to give a definition for "make-believe." :) I'm not opposed to all "make-believe" for my daughter -- just most -- the non-sensical, entertainment-overloaded fluff stuff.
Maybe my thoughts on this are a bit confusing or maybe they are inconsistent. We're still learning and praying and determining what is best for our children and my views may very well change over the years.
While I agree about the cartoon shows and we, as a general rule, do not allow our son to watch them, I have to admit that I don't "get" the argument against fiction books. I think there is a big difference between "vegetating" in front of a TV, especially when children are being bombarded with scenes that contradict Christian values, and having a parent "bring alive" a wholesome book of fiction to a child. I think there is great merit to many books of fiction. I have to be honest that I am quite perplexed with the notion that fiction is "nonsense." Even Jesus used parables and stories about fictional characters to reach people.
We're planning on using the classical approach to homeschooling our son and as such, literature and reading, including a large amount of fictional reading, is a great part of our lives. The fiction (and non-fiction) we have read to our son since birth has greatly enhanced his learning and creativity. At 3 years old, he is very advanced for his age in language, thought-processes, imagination, reasoning, creativity, acting-out of stories, memory, character development, moral reasoning, etc., and I know that the wholesome fiction we have read to him (several hours a day) has played a very important role.
How funny. I just responded to this and then re-read your original post as well as your response to shawnakathleen. It looks like I might have misinterpreted your comment about "nonsense" and thoughts about fiction. At first I thought you were saying all fiction was wrong. When I read your comment, "I'm not opposed to all "make-believe" for my daughter -- just most -- the non-sensical, entertainment-overloaded fluff stuff," I realized we agree more than we disagree on this!! I think that's my argument ... I do not at all like the "entertainment-overloaded fluff" and avoid it (for my son) like the plague; I do, however, love having him enthralled with wholesome fiction that I read to him and I love when he enjoys reading so much that he begs me to read more and more.
I re-did the post a little bit (thanks to Anonymous' comments) because I was confusing. Sorry about that. My brain has been foggy these past few days and I think my posts are really reflecting it.
The debate about fiction vs. non-fiction is just generally a difficult one for me and one that I still don't have a firm idea what I think. I dislike romance novel fiction and don't believe that is very healthy or wholesome (not meaning to create a firestorm with that statement!), but I do see merit in reading "living books" or wholesome classics which are fictional to children. But, there again, the definition of a "living book" or "wholesome classic" is up for debate!
So, anyone want to share their thoughts on this?
Crystal~Although I do allow my children to watch some cartoons, I do feel that most of what is on the TV is garbage and sending hidden or not so hidden messages. I am very picky about what they watch. They have had characters on their clothes before, usually from a relative and yes, they can be quite tacky.
I do think that fictional stories, fairy tales and fantasy is an awesome tool for a child's imagination. That said, I think it is best given in the form of a book. This allows the child's imagination to build the character and scenery. Of course, we must be very discerning in what they read or we read to them. Our values must play a large part in our choices of course.
This is of course just my families thinking, but I thought I'd share.
Oh and yes, I forgot to say -- if you allow your children to watch cartoons or if they wear cartoon characters on their clothing, please know that I have nothing against you and I hope it didn't come out that way. :)
I tend to be an all-or-nothing sort of person and sometimes I come across so harshly and cut and dry in my writings -- I wish I knew how to better convey what I'm trying to say in a compassionate, loving, sweet spirit. I wish I didn't offend so many people when I don't mean to and I wish more people who read my blog knew me in "real life" rather than just via the computer screen because maybe they would understand what I'm trying to convey more.
Ah! Blogging can be a good thing, but recently I've been feeling like it is so ineffective at times at communicating what I really want to communicate. I just wish I could sit down and have tea with each one of you.
Well, that was a little rabbit trail -- my apologies -- it's just been on my heart this week due to a number of individuals who have sincerely misunderstood various things I've posted and what I meant by them and the spirit with which they were posted in. Sometimes it makes me want to give up blogging altogether.
Oh Womanhood, I think you're so sweet. It is hard to convey thoughts in type; there are no nonverbals for others to take cues from and everything sounds so harsh. I've said this before and I'll say it again - mixing up the pot is good. It's unfortunate that your personal feelings are involved when people want to post a bit of good-natured sparring with your opinions.
Gotcha on the fluff-stuff overload - I see what you are trying to say now. If anything, incessant watching of dumbed down television is a DAMPER to creativity and imagination.
Crystal,
I hope you don't stop blogging. I am one of those who have sometimes misunderstood your posts and/or intentions, but I still look forward to reading (and being challenged by) your blog. I also appreciate that you take the time to respond to folks even if they don't necessarily agree with your take on a subject. I think the dialogue is good and helpful.
I don't at all think you came across as saying you had something against those who do let their kids watch cartoons, etc. I took your post as simply conveying your thoughts and opinions on the subject. Although I was perplexed by your comments about fiction, it was not because I felt offended, but rather because I was trying to understand your position.
Even if you do occasionally offend people, I think the majority of us out here know your heart is in the right place. We are all are in the learning process. The difference is that, because you blog, you are opening yourself up to anyone and everyone who chooses to read your blog and thus are much more vulnerable to the criticisms of others. (Hey ... maybe you can look at it that you can free critiques to help you improve your communicating skills ... folks pay a lot of money for that!! :-)
Crystal.
Our children don't wear the fictional stuff on their clothing. We don't watch cartoons either. In fact, we don't watch TV. It's all fiction. Even the "Christian videos" are just fluff and nonsense. I'm sorry but I just don't get into singing vegetables to learn the gospels.
Literature is different than video and TV programming. It is processed differently. Our children read both selected fiction and non fiction. Pilgrim's Progress is fiction. It is allegory as well. But fiction non the less. I agree with another that God has given us an imagination. Creation reflects God's creative imagination. In that way He has deposited some of that same ability within us. Some express it in writing, others in art, others in song. But just because something was written about a person that never actually lived it doesn't means its not worthy of our time or our children's time.
The best thing is to know when and how to introduce the literature to the child. So that the fiction is not presented in the same way as the non fiction.
Crystal~I didn't take any offense whatsoever in regards to the cartoon watching. I realise that we all have slightly different approaches. But the fact is that you are a very sweet person and we are like minded in almost every way. I think you generally come across loving and passionate. Sometimes when we write things our passion comes across strong, but although I've never met you in person, I find you a wonderful person to communicate with.
Maybe some day we'll get to have that cup of tea :-)
Have you seen Veggie Tales? They are wonderful christian cartoons which tell bible stories, and help children deal with certain things, like scary things under the bed etc etc. I personally want my children to know all the classic fairy tales (even the ones that involve witches and things) because sadly, too many children don't know them, and they all have wonderful morals and help with the imagination. A teacher friend of mine says that she can tell which kids know fairy tales and such by their story writing. Sadly, so many kids write about war and other things... no more dragons and princesses in castles.
I remember as a child looking forward to watching "Little House on the Prairie" every Monday night with Dad, Mom, sister, and popcorn. It was a weekly time, set in stone, re-runs or not. "The Waltons" was a similar time as well. But honestly, I can't think of a single show on television today, or really in the last 10 years or so, that I would want my children to watch once, let alone every week. Admittedly, I am not "up" on everything that comes on TV, because we maybe watch about 2 hours per week. We do occasionally let the kids watch "America's Funniest Home Videos" in syndication, but I just pull a blank to think of anything else remotely "decent" for them.
And imagine this- they don't complain! I guess if you never really have it to begin with you don't really miss it!!
Thanks,Crystal, for your thought provoking post.
Anonymous: Thanks for your kind words. I think I was being a little morose tonight. It's just been a long week and I've been struggling with discouragement in other areas of my life and that spills over on the blog sometimes!
Well, I'm a huge Winnie-the Pooh fan. The whole nursery is decorated in classic Pooh. A.A. Milne actually based those Pooh stories on bedtime stories he would tell his young son using his son's stuffed animals as characters. Pooh was a real bear.
I also adore Barbie and My Little Ponies. If (and that is a big IF) I ever have a girl(not looking like I will anytime soon :)) I will make sure she has lots of Barbies. Not Street Walking Barbie but Princess Barbie and more traditional Barbies like I did. My favorite make believe game was having Barbie be mommy to take care of her baby.
Most cartoons are really stupid but there are a few things out there that I let my son watch. Granted, he is only 19 months and his TV attention span is about 10 min.
I don't agree that all toys have to have learning in mind. Kids should be allowed to have fun. My son is infatuated with cars right now and all he does is play with them and look at them. It is so delightful to see his fascination with them. The entire day is cars. He even sleep with them. He has a collection of newspapers with cars on them. I really don't know if he is learning anything except the different types of cars. He knows the difference between vans, trucks,and sedans. He just learned about tanks today.
Anyway, I didn't lose any sleep over Crystal's post. Everybody is going to have a slightly different parenting style. Oh, well. The important thing is that Crystal cares enough to bring up her daughter the best way she knows and right now this involves no cartoons. Fine with me.
BTW, I'm STILL pregnant after two false alarms. Just FYI.
Zan -- :) Loved your post. It cracked me up. :)
I've been thinking of you -- two false alarms, you poor thing. I hope to hear some exciting news soon. :)
Crystal, you made it clear that you weren't judging anyone who feels differently than you....you made that clear in the first post where you offered the clothes. Just because someone has a conviction about something doesn't mean they judge all others who don't share that same conviction.
I've been wondering about you too, Zan! Let us know when He arrives! (o:
Interesting discussion/points of view. Just would like to leave a short note from my own experience.
We do not have TV at home, do not watch it at all, and would not like to see our children-to-be to watch either cartoons or other stuff - for the reasons many of you already mentioned. In addition to majority of programs being un-Biblical, we also believe that TV as a concept is very outdated.
But, as Zan, I am also a very big fan of Winnie-the-Pooh (as my nick indicates as well :-)). The original AA Milne's book has been my favourite since early childhood. I think there are lots of good things and the message of the stories isn't conflicting with Christian/Biblical views at all. However, I do make a strong difference btw original, Classic version and Disney's orange-and-red-cartoon interpretation of Pooh. I am currently expecting :-) and have already bought lots of beautiful Classic Pooh clothes for the little one. But the Disney ones - no way.
You know, I liked Winnie-the-Pooh just fine when I was a very young child EXCEPT that I really hated having to wear the Winnie-the-Pooh dress my grandmother bought me (you know the one with the big red bow at the collar). When I was five, I had to wear the dress for a studio picture to send to my grandmother-- and getting me into that dress was quite the contest of wills between my mother and me.
My big problem with having a cartoon character on my dress was that I viewed myself as a very serious person and I felt foolish being dressed up in Winnie the Pooh clothes. I know I was a weird kid that way probably but I think it's important to remember that kids have a pretty strong sense of dignity and they may not LIKE wearing clothes with silly characters on them. (Of course, I am sure many kids to like it, but still . . .)
I don't mind the Disney Pooh either. But I live in an old fashioned house and new disney stuff would just look tacky on the wall of the nursery.
I love the old Winnie cartoons and watch them with my son. I think "The Honey Tree" is my favorite. I watch very little modern Disney cartoons. They have come a long way...
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