Love through me, Love of God!
I woke up late this morning. Jesse had stayed up until 3 a.m. stuadying and working on his legal project and forgot to set the alarm clock when he went to bed. So, I was shocked when I rolled over in bed this morning and looked at the clock and (gasp!) it was past nine o'clock!
Something about getting up late always seems to get the day off to a bad start for me. I know it shouldn't automatically put me in a bad mood, but I really struggled with feeling overwhelmed and frustrated this morning. My house was messy, I still had dishes to wash from before we left on our trip last weekend (I know, I know! I should have washed them before we left, but I ran out of time!) and lots of laundry to do that hadn't been done since we'd returned, Kathrynne seemed to be especially needy, and Jesse needed the house to be quiet so he could study.
I thought to myself, "If anyone who reads my blog could see me and my home right now, I'm sure they would be horrified." But, such is life. I'm not superwoman -- far from it! Every day there are struggles, every day there are numerous things to trust the Lord about, and a myriad of reasons to realize I can't do this in my own strength.
Being a wife and mother is not glamorous work. It's not a job for the faint-hearted or the quitter. It's work, it's sacrifice, it's a labor of love. And when I think I don't have anything left to give, I can pray with Amy Carmichael:
Something about getting up late always seems to get the day off to a bad start for me. I know it shouldn't automatically put me in a bad mood, but I really struggled with feeling overwhelmed and frustrated this morning. My house was messy, I still had dishes to wash from before we left on our trip last weekend (I know, I know! I should have washed them before we left, but I ran out of time!) and lots of laundry to do that hadn't been done since we'd returned, Kathrynne seemed to be especially needy, and Jesse needed the house to be quiet so he could study.
I thought to myself, "If anyone who reads my blog could see me and my home right now, I'm sure they would be horrified." But, such is life. I'm not superwoman -- far from it! Every day there are struggles, every day there are numerous things to trust the Lord about, and a myriad of reasons to realize I can't do this in my own strength.
Being a wife and mother is not glamorous work. It's not a job for the faint-hearted or the quitter. It's work, it's sacrifice, it's a labor of love. And when I think I don't have anything left to give, I can pray with Amy Carmichael:
Love through me, Love of God,
Make me like Thy clear air
Through which unhindered, colours pass
As thought it were not there.
Powers of the love of God,
Depths of the heart Divine,
O Love that faileth not, break forth,
And flood this world of Thine.
posted by Crystal Paine at 1:59 PM
7 Comments:
Crystal,
I often feel the same way about my house on a bad day. If people saw my closets, me in pajamas at 3pm, and bed unmade, would they still like me and my blog? But we are not to compare and as a person, it is where your heart is at, on Jesus!
As strange as it may sound Crystal, posts like that always make me feel like you are a real person. It makes me know that I can achieve what God has planned for me...I don't have to be a superwoman. Thanks for posting that.
Blessings,
Sommer
I assure you we eould not be horrified...we would merely know that you were human! :)
Be encouraged: years from now your husband will only remember what a blessing you were to him at this time. I highly doubt he will still remember that sink full of dishes!
blessings
Crystal - I agree with Sommer.
I certainly don't want you to feel frustrated, but it is nice to know that I am not alone in feeling overwhelmed by my responsibilities sometimes. My husband has been out of town a lot and working very hard recently and he will be out of town this weekend as well. So, when I woke up this morning I had a similar feeling. I finally snapped out of it after some caffeine, but it is so easy for me to let a grumpy morning mood control my day. I think that the real challenge for me is to say "Yes, I am crabby, but I have to change my attitude now b/c I set the temperature in this house & I want it to be comfortable".
Easier said than done sometimes...at least for me.
:)
I agree with the previous comments here and can only add, to you and Shannon, that people don't like you and your blog because they think you are perfect. Actually, I need to remind myself of that.
It's easier to feel close to someone who is not perfect, especially because we live so closely with our own imperfections.
Thanks for sharing! Believe it or not, it's encouraging.
You all are so kind. Thanks for accepting me just as I am -- faults and all. Glad that my struggles and learnings can be an encouragement to other moms.
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