More important than cash and prestige
Perhaps Linda Hirshman thinks anyone who gives up prestige and paycheck to stay home and raise their babies is inherently stupid. Maybe she didn't count on the fact that many stay at home moms are educated, articulate, and not willing to take her nonsense lying down.
As to my own thoughts, there is one thing I really don't understand about Ms. Hirshman's position. She seems to believe that a woman should avoid staying at home at all costs, because raising one's babies doesn't involve intelligence, prestige, honor, or money. But surely she doesn't think all women will hold positions of prestige and power if they join the workforce! What about janitors, hamburger flippers, Walmart associates, and truck drivers. For sure, women can do all these jobs. But where is the prestige, power, and I might add, where is the huge paycheck going to come from? What a woman would earn in a job like that might just pay for daycare.
I could easily get a great job at a nice daycare, and ship my kids off to someone else. Then I'd be "feminist" and "my own woman" and "independent" and "honored" (by people like Linda Hirshman). But to what end? Why should I go take care of someone else's kids so that I'm not "bound" to my home and my own kids?
Perhaps people like Hirshman want women to flood the workforce, take over, push the men out of all the good positions, and relegate men to toilet scrubbing and day-care running? That would be the only way I could think of that feminists could get their desire for all women to dump their kids in favor of power and prestige. Unfortunately for radical feminists, what they don't realize (or don't want to accept) is that such a feminist "utopia" would never work. They've clearly forgotten that women are perfectly capable of being catty, competitive, unpleasant, backstabbing, discontent and all around jerks in the workplace. Actually, that's one reason I'm glad I'm not working right now. I got my fill of that before I was married, and prefer the quiet, family- and home-centered life, with a few close friends, lots of love, and my husband's job providing what we need to live on.
As to intellect: I'd like to see how well Ms. Hirshman manages to budget her glorious and honorable paycheck, and if she could feed four people plus weekly guests on less than $250/month (without using Ramen noodles once!). I'd be willing to bet she hasn't even tried. It's hard. Does she know where to get a brand new brand name dress for $1? I do. Does she know how to get rid of mold on woodwork? I do. Has she taught her child to count bilingually? I do. How many books does she read per week? I bet I could match her. Non-fiction, too. Does she read the works of people who disagree with her (no she doesn't, according to Spunky)? I do. I find the practice mind stretching and conviction strengthening, rather than overwhelming and upsetting.
So, I'm an uneducated, poor, 4-years-married, 23-year-old wife of one and mother of two. And you know what? I may not be as articulate or intellectual as some other women (stay-at-home or working!), but I do have one thing that is more important than cash and prestige.
I'm happy.
posted by Crystal Paine at 12:46 AM
8 Comments:
Amen! Very Well Said(especially coming from one of "us" you know the "stupid" moms. lol)
Thank you for sharing!
Hugs,
Kim
One thing that occurs to me:
Who is going to do all the day care that would be required? Would day care have to be run entirely by men? Would women in day care centers have to make sure their own children went to different day cares? What about teachers? What about housekeeping and laundry? If Hirschman's vision came true, then all of these things would have to simply be done outside the home, and I'm betting that most of these things will be done by women. Does she really think it's more meaningful to wash another family's clothes than your own family's clothes?
A LOUD AMEN! from this corner!!!
Thnak you for sharing.
Ugh! I can't stand that woman!
She reminds me of my former boss. If you see her on TV she acts so cold and calculating. She is probably miserable and just wants to spread it around.
This is one thing I wouldn't trade for the power and prestige of holding a job: Almost everday at nap time, I lay down beside my infant and breast feed him and rest for a full hour. It is my favorite time of the day. To watch him feed and hold me. I just can't describe it. When he falls asleep I watch him until my toddler wakes up or I nap too. He needs me so much and is so dependent on me. I often think, when he was born, he sought me our first. THey laid him on me and he looked at me very intently and stopped crying. I remember reading an article that babies seek out their mother's face first. They have been hearing her voice in the womb and they want to see her.
I know I should be doing housework or something "useful" during nap time but, I know that this cuddling time is so short and I want to soke up every minute.
I did this with my first one and I will try to do it with every baby I have. I love my babies. Just looking at one should be proof to anyone that there is a God.
Anyway, in a Hircshman world, I would not be able to have this time.
Thankyou, Lord, for letting me be able to enjoy my children to the fullest and be their primary caregiver.
Thank you for sharing this with us...her words are just wonderful, and so true.
Woo hoo! I loud AMEN! from over here too!
Wonderful, wonderful, wonderful!
Thank you, God, for giving women the strength to speak up for Your truth!
This letter moved me to tears. Crystal, many thanks for posting it!
Visiting for the first time...
So very well said!!! I've been a SAHM since my oldest, whose seven, was born...and recently a home school mom, as well. It's very hard work but very, very rewarding...and when my little girls look at me sometimes (not all the time, mind you, but sometimes!) with such love and awe...well, that's more than enough prestige for me.
Great blog...I'll be back!
Blessings...
~Tammy
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