"When I am weak, He is strong."
I have emailed you a few times and you posted a question of mine several months ago. I am also 19 weeks pregnant which I have mentioned before but I need some encouragment. I am still battling morning sickness and I am getting a little down. Are you still battling this or is going away? Some days are okay but I am so tired from that I feel like I am just in time stopping warp of my life like everything is on hold. Do you have any encouragment? -ChrissyHi, Chrissy!
Oh I can relate. So. very. much! Much as I love babies, I'll readily admit that pregnancy is difficult for me. I seem to be one of those people who doesn't miss out on many of the possible symptoms of pregnancy. And some days it can be so overwhelming. In fact, the last two days, I didn't know if I could make it out of bed in the morning. "I just want to lie here and sleep for at least four more hours," I thought. But, it was 7:30 a.m. and my day had to begin - Kathrynne was awake and needing cared for, Jesse needed his lunch fixed, and there was no running away from it! This is life and it must go on, regardless of how tired I feel. I'm sure just about every other mom out there can relate.
Thankfully, the morning sickness has subsided, but it has been replaced with major fatigue. Many days, my energy level has been about at 25% and my concentration is even worse. Some days it seems I just go around in circles! I'm usually a very high-energy person. I love going, going, going and doing, doing, doing. However, right now, I'm anything but that. In fact, many days, doing just a few things can wipe me out.
How do I survive? One day at a time, knowing that "this too shall pass." It's for a very good cause and it is worth it. There is an end in sight and it is a good end. No one said mothering was a cake-walk and if they think that, they've obviously not been a mom. But, it is worth it. I look at little Kathrynne's smiling face, hear her babbling as she plays, and I know it is worth it. Very worth it. I'd endure much more to be a mom.
Secondly, I've cut way back on responsibilities and commitments. I'm very, very cautious about taking on anything new, even if it is something small. I'm learning to say "no" - even though it goes against my nature. Lord-willing, I'll have many more opportunities in the future to say "yes." This is not the season. Right now, my focus is on keeping our home functioning, training Kathrynne, and getting as much sleep as possible. Some things have to slide and I can't spend my days feeling guilty about what I can't do, I must just focus on what I can do.
Thirdly, I try to not "over plan" my day and just keep things very simple. If I have energy, I might do some extra organization or cook/bake something a little nicer for dinner. If not, the organization can wait and dinner can be very simple. (You want to know what we had for dinner last night? Rotisserie chicken from a nearby store's deli, some minute brown rice, and a bagged salad. We had extra money leftover in our grocery budget, so Jesse just went to the store and picked a few things up.)
Jesse has been doing a LOT for me recently, too. There is no way I'd get as much done in a day as I do if it weren't for his support, encouragement, and help. Last night he not only went to the store, he came home and helped get dinner ready, and then gave Kathrynne a bath and got her ready for bed. He does so much for me, without my even asking. For instance, remember me saying we only spent $20 at the store this past week? Jesse did all that shopping. I just planned it and sent the coupons with him, and he took care of it. I'm very blessed with such a husband! I definitely try to reciprocate whenever I have the energy!
Most importantly, I try to start my day with Bible reading and prayer and then to meditate on Scripture throughout the day. I must rely on God's strength right now, for I do not have a lot of my own. I've found it is so good to feel so inadequate because it forces me to look to the Lord and stop trying to do things in and of myself. "When I am weak, He is strong." If I had it "all together," I wouldn't need the Lord.
I feel for you so much, Chrissy. Last time my morning sickness did not subside until 22 weeks. It seems like about the longest 22 weeks of my life ever. I don't know if anything I've shared has been an encouragement to you, but it's just where I'm at and what has helped me to survive. I will be praying for you.
For the rest of you moms out there: What helps you in your times of weakness? Please do share. Chrissy and I and other moms could really use the encouragement!
posted by Crystal Paine at 2:19 PM
10 Comments:
those are all really great tips for the more emotional side of it. it is so important to remember that this is just a season, and not to get bogged down. i had 2 previous miscarriages this year, and then horrible morning sickness for 18 or so weeks (i'm now at 22) - so i felt like i couldn't complain about how bad i felt b/c of the blessing, but at the same time, i felt REALLY bad! :) now i'm in the super fatigue stage, and i aim to get the basics doen (including caring for our 2 yr old).
a practical tip that helps me - stay hydrated. when i'm not hydrated, i get dizzy, nauseous, etc... especially if i'm in the grocery store or something. try to always keep some cold water on hand - yesterday at the grocery store, i had to snag a pricey bottled water from the front and just drink it (paid for it at checkout of course) b/c i was literally about to pass out. but just that bit of water super helped me. i was actually surprised at what a difference it made.
also, remembering - doing the best you can for right now - and if that's not a lot, then there's grace for that - both from God and your family. express your needs - saying "husband, family, whoever, i feel really bad and need x,y,z because of x,y,z" - that way, they concretely understand what's going on with you, and how they can help - much better than "i feel gross, why aren't you doing more" :)
- frequent reader, SAHM to 2 yr old, and 22 wks along (praise God)
I agree so much about relying on the Lord's strength, and just recognizing this as the season it is. I am 24 weeks with my second, and have a very busy 2 yr old, who I am busy potty training and trying to prepare for helping me with the new baby.
I am so very blessed to not have to deal with mornign sickness as long as you ladies (I very much feel for you!), but I am also in that place of extreme fatigue. I was actually feeling particularly wiped this morning and afternoon, so I spent some time reading and thinking about ways to help with the fatigue. A few things that I came up with were:
-staying well hydrated- when I start to forget to drink my water, it makes a huge difference in how well I feel
-keeping my protein intake up
-eating in general- when I get busy, I tend to forget to eat, especially because I do not purchase convenience foods and most things require preparation. Having easy baked goods on hand (whole wheat muffins, corn bread, etc.) and lots of fruit, cheese, etc. makes snacking a bit easier.
-getting enough iron and B vitamins (or taking a supplement)
-giving myself grace to stop and rest or nap when I need to and am able to
-getting exercise and/or fresh air (even when I feel exhausted, sometimes just forcing myself to take my dd out for a walk can be invaluable in renewing my energy)
-making small, manageable goals and keeping my expectations realistic- I am not keeping my house spotless or making gourmet meals. Today my major goal, other than caring for my dd and myself, was to clean the floors (which I have to do in small chunks, not all at once) and to make dinner (chicken salad with garlic toast- very simple). If my baskets of clean laundry get folded, it'll be a really good day! :)
More than anything, I hope that you feel encouraged to know that you are not alone in your struggles and discouragment. As Crystal said, this too shall pass and is so worth the blessing at the end. Today my dd was telling me all about the new baby, "And the baby comin' in the summertime and I'm gonna hold the baby and kiss the baby and hold the baby's hand and Mommy gonna hold the baby and give the baby milkies..." It reminded me of what a blessing and gift this baby will be and already is. I pray that the Lord will give you strength as you continue this pregnancy and nurture this sweet little gift from God.
Love Stephanie
Dear ladies, I'm a mom of 7 who's probably past the season of pregnancies (although babies have been known to arrive late in a woman's life) and let me encourage you to hang in there! It is most definitely worth it...all of it.
With #6 I had read a book advocating having a protein snack at bedtime to alleviate morning sickness. So I did..peanut butter toast and a glass of milk every night. It helped a lot. (Baby was 10# 4 oz., definitely my biggest one, so perhaps I should have been more careful about making my snack low fat. However, my grandpa was a big man, so it might have been genetic.)
And use my secret weapon...take naps whenever the toddler does. With #3 I had to barricade #2 in the living room and set #1 to watch and wake me if he escaped, but those naps were my lifeline.
Best wishes and congratulations to you all.
SLEEP! This is the number one thing for me right now (pregnant with 3rd). With an active, climbing 1-yr old, and a 6-yr old that I homeschool, naps are very hard to come by. So I go to bed right after the kids (usually about 9) and sleep until about 7. Resisting the urge to stay up late or get up early and be "productive" is hard, but it makes all the difference. I don't get to do anything "extracurricular" (like scrapbooking, etc), but I figure that my extracurricular activity right now is growing a baby! I do manage to get in a walk after dinner, and a quiet time while the kids eat breakfast, and sometimes a little reading before sleep. Probably the thing that suffers the most is time with my husband, but he is very understanding and works with me. A good night's sleep is VERY counter-cultural, but it's wonderful medicine!
Great tips!! Here are some things that I remembered that helped me a lot(youngest is 4yrs.) Even when I was at my sickest I kept the blinds open on the windows and let in as much sunlight as I could get. If you live somewhere where you can get fresh air that will help also. Try to avoid air freshners. The other thing that I found to be a blessing was putting a smile on my face and thinking happy thoughts. Imagine how you are going to feel holding that precious new baby right after he/she is born. A smile and positive thoughts will take you far. Just remember that your home will still be there when this trial passes; it just might be messier. Praise the Lord through it all.
Blessings---Mrs. Johnson
You have some great tips as do your readers who commented. There is one thing that really helped my mom, my sister, and I that might be worth trying. I see someone already suggested making sure you have enough iron and B vitamins. My mom's nurse-practictioner suggested when she was pregnant that she take an extra 100MG of B-6 in addition to her prenatal vitamin. She did, and her morning sickness totally subsided. She passed this info along to me, and I started taking extra B-6 as soon as I started trying to get pregnant, and it really alleviated most of my morning sickness. Of course, before doing so, I researched it and discussed it with my midwife, as should anyone before trying it themselves. I found that B-6 is water soluble, so whatever your body can't use, it will just pass out of your system. Thus, it can't hurt you. It may not help all women, but I know it works wonders for the women in our family.
STAY HYDRATED!!! I had horrible morning sickness, and ended up in the hospital with an IV. I was severely dehydrated, and after the IV pumped fluids back into me-- I never felt sick again.
I'm not so sure that I can give very many tips because I'm in the same boat! LOL! I am 16 weeks along with my 5th and still have morning sickness every day. I am also in that fatigue stage which is not fun either. Unfortunately, I have to take prescription meds (Zofran) to alleviate the worst of my morning sickness.
Just tonite as I was trying to make some dinner, I broke down in tears to my sweet hubby because I was so tired, nauseated and am starting to get a sore throat. Ugh! You know what? It helped. I think sometimes "WE" expect so much more of ourselves than do others that it becomes more than we can bear. God never told us we had to bear our burdens alone and I just have to be reminded of that sometimes. An old song I used to listen to years ago said, "His strength is perfect when our strength is gone". I just wish I would quit waiting until my strength is gone before I remember that! :)
Thank you all for your great tips and encouragment. It helps to be reminded that I am not alone. I also have a 2 year old and a 6 year old and I am so used to be going and doing and on top of it all. I am used to my time with my hubby. I am like you all I am now not just sick feeling all the time but extremely fatigued. I apprecitate it all. It really lifts me up to know you aren't alone. But I also appreciate Crystal's tip on living day to day and just trying to rely on God.
Chrissy
Thankfully, I didn't ever have morning sickness like both of you have described. I do, however, want to share something that I read only this morning from The Lactivist. She said that in her first pregnancy, she had a normal OB-GYN and when she complained of dibilitating morning/noon/night sickness, his best advice was to rest and "keep as much down as possible." For her second pregnancy, she had a midwife who suggested protein! She said to try to eat 100 grams of protein a day. And she said that the days she got closest to that goal were the days she didn't feel as sick. Also, she said if she caught the sickness in the beginning stages early enough and was able to put some protein in her system quickly enough, it prevented it from getting worse and even make it better! Here's her post on the subject: http://thelactivist.blogspot.com/2007/01/pregnancy-tip-for-nausea-lots-of.html
She also mentions on her blog what foods have the most protein and serving sizes and such. I hope that helps!
Post a Comment
<< Home