Input requested: Witnessing opportunities from home
Hello! I have been reading your blog for a long time and I really admire how you are sacrificing yourself for your family and especially God by deciding to be a stay-home wife and mother all for the glory of the Lord. I was wondering how are you are able to outreach and to witness other ladies about the Gospel and the salvation through the blood of Lord Jesus Christ by staying at home? I would like to hear from you about this. - Carissa
Carissa, what a great question! There are so many things I could share on this and I am hoping - in the not-too-distant future - to release an audio CD along the lines of this very subject. I sometimes think we buy into the mentality that the only kind of work we can do for God is to go out and be involved in some Christian ministry. This is not to say that working for Christian ministries is wrong, but I think we often overlook the powerful potential of a wife and mother who sees her home as the center of ministry. There are so many ways a wife and mother can be a witness for Christ - even in the everyday things of life. I could share volumes on ways my parents used our home growing up as a center of evangelism and ministry to the lost. The possibilities are endless.
Here are just a few ideas from me personally that I've done or am doing at this season of my life:
First and foremost, as a mom, I have a tremendous witnessing opportunity right there to my little children. It is my responsibility before God as my children's mother, to follow the admonition found in Deuteronomy 6 to diligently impart the Word of God to these precious little souls. By raising up her children in the fear of the Lord and by living a Godly life and example before them, a woman is training up the next generation for the glory of God. Through her words and her life, her children can see Christ lived out day in and day out.
I have almost daily opportunities to witness through everyday life - to our neighbors, to the clerk at the grocery store, to the nurse at the doctor's office. I often don't sit down and share a Gospel presentation with these people, but just by smiling, showing love, and speaking a word of encouragement, a door will open to share something of the Lord. And through this a seed is planted. Sometimes that little door will open into the opportunity to share much more than a tiny word about the Lord and I will soon find myself sharing my entire testimony and the great things the Lord has done in my life with this person. By loving my children, smiling and shining for Christ as I interact with the world, serving my husband, being contented where God has me, showing genuine gratitude, and so on, I have the opportunity to be a light. As others see a difference in my life, they take note and often comment. Little comments like, "Wow, you're such a great mom!" or something like that can often serve as a springboard to share Christ or at least plant a little seed in someone's heart. I'm no perfect example of this but I try to often remind myself that I may be the only Christian someone ever meets and I want them to see a clear difference in me - a difference that only Christ can make.
Oftentimes, God has opened doors for me to witness "indirectly" in that I am holding up the hands of those who are going out and witnessing and making it possible for them to go to the "uttermost parts of the earth." These can be just simple things like praying for and financially supporting missionaries or writing letters of encouragement to them. Building up my husband and encouraging him as he goes out into a sin-darkened world is another way that I am able to participate in witnessing, albeit "behind the scenes."
Another witnessing opportunity that the Lord has opened up for me is through this blog and through writing. I never expected that the Lord would touch down and reach unsaved souls through what I've written here or elsewhere, but it has been incredibly exciting for me to be able to hear from those whom God has brought to saving faith through what I've shared on this blog. As I said above, it was often that someone, by the grace of God saw a difference in my life, and they began to seek out the Source of that difference.
posted by Crystal Paine at 9:28 PM
19 Comments:
I agree with what you listed. All those things really do open up opportunities that are so easily overlooked. If we rush through a store or get grumpy in a line ... we are losing chances to spread the gospel. I try (can't always) to go patiently and slowly, to pray with my boys that we will impact someone that day and to be ready when the little chance surprisingly comes. I also try to make sure to hit the same cashiers at the stores I frequent. I begin to build relationships with them and they see more and more of how I act and interact with my children. Opens up doors. Another tip is when your children get old enough to begin trying out various sports. Connections with other families are huge. I am very busy managing my home and caring for the children and schooling all of them. But I would think it a shame if I didn't take the time to get together for a park day with the families I met at baseball practice and perhaps a chance to talk to that mom about Jesus. That is the life I've been given and so God will give me the opportunities to glorify Him within it. I really think it has a greater impact than a lot of other things people consider "real ministry." Looking back on my life, it's the people I was able to watch who made more impact on my life than the people who talked to me.
Crystal, since the lifestyle we speak about - how do I put it mildly? - doesn't fit in with the modern culture, I often receive pitying looks. "Oh, poor thing. She doesn't have a life. While we 'hang out' and enjoy ourselves, she cleans and cooks for her family. POOR THING."
The only way, in my opinion, to deal with that and to be a light to others is to radiate joy and happiness every day, which isn't always easy. Sometimes I feel more grumpy than joyful. But I know that I'm representing something, certain values, and if the people I meet today - especially the ones that don't see me very often - see my sour face, it can give the impression that I'm some sort of oppressed slave.
Where am I getting to? To serve as a light to others a different, beautiful vision, we must find the light of contentment in our own hearts and let it shine through.
Whenever strangers comment on my and my husband's joyful manner and loving relationship, I always answer with a smile and a response about how we certainly feel blessed, and that it's all through the goodness of Christ that we are so happy together. As a stay-at-home wife without children yet, I frequently receive those "strange looks" from women when I explain that I never felt so productive or so fulfilled when I was working outside our home. I try my hardest - only with God's grace - to not be deterred from sharing His word when someone responds negatively. Just this weekend, at the wedding of a very devout couple, we were seated at the reception with two guests who had been visibly bored during the (absolutely beautiful and moving) Mass. At one point, I quietly asked my husband if he would please introduce us to a couple that arrived late to take their seats at our table, and the woman beside me said loudly, "Why can't you do it yourself?" I pleasantly explained that my husband was the head of our family in Christ, and therefore represented us best! Without being overbearing or self-centered, I tried to witness to those around us throughout the evening, with simple statements such as, "Doesn't the bride look beautiful? She is absolutely glowing with the Holy Spirit!" By the end of the party, after a few hours of watching my husband and I interact with each other and all the members of our table, I really felt that this couple was moved by our devotion to our marriage and to the Lord. (Especially the husband - I noticed that he was very interested when my husband mentioned that he had never been so productive at work before he married me, since I took over all the household duties and brought "peace and inspiration" to his heart. I felt so blessed at that moment.)
Jessica, what a wonderful example :-)
Aisha
I will be a work-at-home mother in just a couple of weeks, but I currently work in a Christian ministry. I wouldn't have traded my time there for anything - it's been a time of tremendous growth and learning - but when the only places you go are to your church or to your Christian workplace, you have almost no witnessing opportunities. I'm looking forward to my next stage in life, which I foresee as actually having more contact with my community in general.
In this season of my life, I work outside our home. I work as a receptionist/secretary for our local city government. As such, I am very often the first and only voice that many people hear for our city. Many of the phone calls we receive are complaints. I do my best, with the help of the Holy Spirit, to help them with their problems, if its only to listen to them. I smile and am as pleasant as possible - trying to remember that I represent Christ - also knowing, like you said, that many times I am the only Jesus some people see. I have been able to witness some and I always try to be a blessing to everyone I meet. I know that this is just a small thing but right now, this is where God has me and I will do what He wants me to do while I'm here.
It was a breath of fresh air to read this post. Sometimes as a busy mom of two little ones, it's hard to carve out that time to write the encouraging notes, make a meal for another family, or practice hospitality. While I plan on still continuing to try and do those things, it was nice to hear my beliefs reinforced as far as witnessing through being a good mom, wife, etc. in the seemingly smaller ways.
Just as a side note, I can totally agree with what you said about witnessing to the world without really intending to. When I was in labor with my son, I was having a really difficult time getting through the contractions. I had brought a list of hand copied verses that I had taped onto the bed rail and kept looking at them to try and keep my mind off the pain. My husband also would read them aloud to me. He had stepped out of the room for a moment and just then a nurse came in. She saw me in obvious distress and gave my hand a squeeze. Then she started reading the verses aloud to me, too! I was surprised, especially when she came to me after the delivery and said that she didn't know such encouraging, uplifting verses were actually in the Bible and planned to open her Bible when she got home and start reading it again after not walking as a Christian for twenty years! So, you never know what small things will have a huge impact.
I think in this day and age of Emailing, it's easy to lose sight of the powerful impact a hand written card or letter can be. It only takes a minute to write out a little note of encouragement or a "thinking of you" type of message and let's face it--even with the rising postage costs, 41 cents is cheap to be able to mail an envelope anywhere in the US.
By the way, Crystal, this is off topic, but I've been meaning to ask you for awhile how old you are. I figure you won't mind telling at this point because you must still be in your twenties, although your maturity seems beyond your years. When is your birthday? I'd like to send a little birthday Email on your special day!
(I'm 25!)
Here are some ideas:
1. The first step is for you and your husband to connect with your pastor about your desire to witness from your home. Once made officially available, your home can become one of your church's local missions bases for outreach into the world in a very organized way.
2. Organize a weekly children's Bible study club in your living room for children in your neighborhood, or for underprivileged children in your community. Create an inexpensive felt board display for Bible stories, provide milk and cookies, and share the Gospel with little ones.
3. Contact a local office of Campus Crusade or Youth With a Mission, or Inter Varsity Christian Fellowship, etc. etc. and offer your guest room/sofa/living room floor for travelling missionaries or ministry teams.
4. Form a league with other Christian young mothers in your church or community; meet weekly for intercessory prayer for the unsaved, bake goodies or sew for needy families/inmates/patients in hospitals, create tracts, raise money for other outreach initiatives or to sponsor a seminarian, provide babysitting for one another so that you can take on one small outreach project of your own each week.
Your question is so encouraging! :)
Another way to witness while being a stay at home mom (providing the needs of your family are being met) is to serve others. I think it makes a huge impact when you're willing to go help someone who is not a Christian with housework or bring food when there is a need. Especially in a world where many people are busy with their careers or just too selfish to do so. And getting your children involved in helping helpst teach them a spirit of giving and servitude.
I've also found that just telling people I'm praying for them plants a seed. I recently had a friend who was having pregnancy complications. I told her I was praying for her, etc. Later on when she had another crisis, she asked me to pray. And this is someone who has never done that before. So some sort of seed was planted.
I think Crystal mentioned many good ways to witness to others while having home and children as your main job.
One thing that may be helpful to remember is that the opportunities change as the children grow.
When my children were all really little we had some regular play groups that we went to. If you want opportunities to witness to people it helps if you are willing to hang out with people that don't know Jesus! :) La Leche League meetings are great for this, as are community groups. Be on the lookout for ways to genuinely connect with people. Nobody wants to feel like your missionary project--they are looking for real relationships. Be willing to invest!
As the children grow they may start being in sports, taking music lessons, or some other activities that open up opportunities to get to know others. As you are able to you can just get to know the people you come into contact with. Eventually conversations and opportunities come along.
I have some close friends that live in a central Asian country where they cannot openly be missionaries. The husband has a real job there doing real work that is not missionary. But their goal is to live life in a way that builds relationships with their neighbors and community, so they can eventually share Christ with them. (They have been there for five years and are having a lot of people come to Christ, so it's working! :) ) So, they are very purposeful about how they do things so that they can both "do life" as well as meet their goals of relationship building and evangelism.
They are in the states on a break right now and the wife shared with me some of the things they do. For instance, the wife could cut her husband's hair, but by choosing to spend a little money and go to a barber, the husband has been able to build a relationship with the barber and the men at the barber shop. Many times there are things they could do themselves but they choose to give business to those in their community so that they continue to have time to talk and visit with these people, as well as economically support them. Why not do more of this in the USA?
The things my friend told me inspired me to think more about living my life with relationship building and lifestyle evangelism in mind, more than thrift, speed, or habit.
I think we have a lot of opportunities but it's easy to miss them because it is regular to us.
Also, Crystal's point about a smile or a word of encouragement is a great reminder. Depending on how a person was raised, they may feel like if they aren't handing out tracts or going through the Romans Road with someone that they aren't doing enough. God is on the move, and we often have no idea how our simple kindnesses are used to further God's plan in someone's life. God wastes nothing! :)
This morning within an hour of reading a post about doctrine mattering on Pulpit Magazine, there was an accident in front of our house. The circumstances became a springboard to God orchestrating a conversation with a visitor to the neighbor next door about surrogant motherhood, Abraham and Sarah and Hagar, God as the One opening and closing the womb, stem cell research, organ transplants, and Christians being loving and kind toward others in society while also standing for what God says and means. Where there is a will bent toward God, He makes the way via circumstances we least plan or anticipate.
One idea I learned while listening to Mrs. Marlene Evans (First Baptist Church of Hammond Indiana) before she passed to glory:
Buy a handful of prestamped postcards at the post office. Send these out with words of blessing when you can. A simple "I've been praying for you" could lift someone's day. I used to send these cards to my students when I caught them being good or they did well on a paper. The parents always commented that the postcard stayed on teh fridge for a long time!
Our ladies Bible study is writing some of these 'blessing cards' tomorrow. Here's a partial list for me:
Ozzie's swim teacher
Preacher and his wife
Library ladies
the mayor
Elderly aunties
The firechief who did safety screen
Far away friends
Our music teacher
the nurses who cared for our baby in the the filthy hospital in Memphis before we got there (they do the best the can with the limited resources available)
and so on...
Katie in Ohio
YOu are right that you can set an example through your everyday life. I briefly worked for the County Tax Collector's Office, responsible for calling homeowner's regarding delinquent tax payments. As you can imagine, many of the people I had to contact were less than enthusiastic and sometimes obscene in their response to my call. One phone call, however, has always stayed with me. The woman on the other end of the line was polite and cheerful. She referred me to her husband because "we have a traditional marriage and he handles the taxes." Her husband was also very polite and gracious. I happily contacted them a few days later with the news that their delinquent tax notice had been issued in error. The wife thanked me, and then I thanked her for being so kind despite the error. She replied that she and her husband were Christians and tried to live their beliefs in every aspect of their lives--even when dealing with the tax office! It was a powerful testimony to me, and I have always tried to keep their example before me in my dealings with other people. You never know what chance may arise to win someone to Christ! Miss Kris
I just had to make a comment on this subject. For me personally the opportunities to witness are honestly sometimes more than I can handle. We get to talk with many different people whenever we go to any store.
That is where we make most of our contacts for Christ is in stores. If your children are well behaved, joyfull, helpful and neat you will most likely have people coming up to asking about your family.
Also, whenever a telemarketer calls I will let them say their piece then I ask them if they know Jesus Christ.
Your neighbors are also potential Christians. Pray for them. Ask God to show you which one or ones He wants you to witness to. Take them food, be available to help when needed. Show that you are friendly.
Of course last but not least we are witnessing to our children daily. We pray for them and teach them the Word of God daily. We want them to be strong believers in Jesus Christ when they grow up.
I follow your blog, but don't comment often because it can be so hard to come across the way we want to. I'll be praying for you and your little one. My last pregnancy ended in a somewhat stressful manner, but my baby and I were fine and very thankful to God for the way everything worked out!
I agree that our children are our first mission field. This is my priority in this stage of my life. Part of my witness to others is the way I help my husband and raise my children.
Maybe it would be helpful to remember that it is not necessarily how many people we witness to, but whether or not we witness to whoever God brings along our path. I think it is also important to remember that 'witnessing' is not limited to a passing remark while in line at the grocery store or bank or handing a tract to someone at the office. My mom has been such a great example to me of cultivating friendships with other women - be they neighbours, someone she passes on her walk every day or unsaved family members. She works very hard at being a good friend, and seeing those other ladies as a friend, not a project. Her friends get to see her through all the ups and downs of life and she has plenty of opportunity to share the truth of God's Word through it all. She is in it for the long haul, and has been witnessing to some friends for many years. She has also been kind and gracious for many years, making an effort to keep in touch even when a friend has reacted in hostility to something my mom has shared from the Bible. I've learned a lot from watching her. My mom is a great Titus 2 lady to me. :)
Maybe we should just pray for God to send someone to whom we can show His love and His plan for salvation. Then we can get busy being friendly to the one(s) He sends in answer to that prayer!
(UK MUM) I used to witness to people who were on the streets- begging, drinking or selling the charity paper 'the big issue', and also to a 'gentleman tramp' (as I like to think of him) who tidied our church grounds, as was his custom in return for some shelter. And I would also see people I had first met as a volunteer in a charity shop, or on the fringes of church, who were about on the street with time on their hands for whatever reason, such as people with head injuries and mental health difficulties. Other people rarely chat to these groups in the way I did, though it happens more than you'd guess. I have seen people guess I'm a christian quickly; another (gentle but begging) man I spent hours talking to, is now settled and cleaned up, though not in touch with me, I hope my chat helped. Lots of seeds. It doesn't work so well now I have children- I am more cautious and even chatting to safe friendly people standing around for too long is not good (boredom leads to crying or napping "ohno, got my priorities wrong again").
Recently, I have been witnessing to Muslims. I live in the city of Bradford in the north of England where we have a large Indian and Pakistani community(lots of people from everywhere in fact; a centuries old melting pot due to the textiles industry which has been topped up a lot recently). As a woman who deserved my white dress, shall I say, I often have more fundamentals in common with Muslim women my age than with than with non-Christians who look like me.
That was a talking point at the pub in the village I grew up in too!My family was active in the community and my wedding was a big thing. 'Why aren't John and Kathy sleeping together?' was asked...!
I agree friendliness can be a blessing that gets you recognition- I still get remembered four years after I worked on supermarket tills. I tried to do that for God, but my own personal way is quite 'out there' too. Be careful too with men..I think of myself as Esther 'pleasing to all who see her'- though I'm not really -but it can be difficult to be sensitive, gentle, courteous and firm, to those who make inappropriate requests and comments, especially persistent ones. just try my best.
Crystal-my last negative message was only my 'dark-night-of-the-soul'-side crying out. I understand why you didn't put it up...I think. Sorry.
Kathy, uk mum
Crystal - thank you so much for posting this, it was brilliant! So often, stay-at-home wives/mums are overlooked as unable to truly evangelise to people and do ministry because they are "stuck inside"; but you have shown that this is not the case at all. God bless you dearly
Post a Comment
<< Home