Learning to be patient
Good morning! Wow - I'm so thankful for a good night's rest. It's amazing how sleep can refresh you! For all those of you who are so faithfully praying, I wanted to give an update on what's going on here - even if I don't have a lot of new news to report...
First off, I want to say thank you so very much for praying, for caring, for emailing, for the many offers to help... I can't tell you how much it means to us. I woke up yesterday feeling very needy - not only was I physically exhausted since my body is severely lacking in energy - but emotionally and spiritually I was feeling great need. The uncertainty, the "what-ifs," and the possibility that I could have some potentially very dangerous and life-altering condition was not very heartening to me, especially as a young mom. I slept very little and prayed a lot Monday night. God brought many Scriptures to mind which were a great comfort and I wrestled to fully and completely cast my burdens and cares upon Him. It is one thing to say He is Sovereign and trustworthy, but to live it - in the face of difficulty - is where the rubber meets the road.
After sharing on my blog and in my email newsletter yesterday morning and requesting prayer, it was only a few hours before God completely lifted the burdens and weariness from my heart. Maybe nothing had changed physically, but I had complete peace in my heart. I know this peace and assurance is only the result of God's grace and many prayers on my behalf. So, thank you, from the bottom of my heart.
We spent most of yesterday running more tests and more tests. None of the tests gave any clear answers as to why my platelet count and hemoglobin is so low and continuing to drop. I have been officially dubbed the "perplexing case" on this floor and have everyone stumped. In spite of this, the good news is that they were able to rule out many, many potential diseases, problems, and so forth yesterday - which was highly encouraging and a great relief to me. I told my mom last night that in addition to ruling out so many of the major diseases we were concerned might be the cause of my problems, we've found out that I'm quite a healthy person since I've had just about every internal organ checked in my body for every problem imaginable and nothing abnormal is turning up. I suppose that's nice to know! :)
After hours of tests, they called in the perinatologist to help with my case. We had a sonogram and consultation with him yesterday afternoon and there was more good news to report, namely, that the baby is very healthy and just exactly at the size and stage he or she is supposed to be for 36 weeks. As some of you know, there had been some earlier concerns with our sonogram at 18 weeks and the cysts which showed up in the baby's brain. Though we were told we probably had nothing to worry about there, getting the reassurance that everything was healthy at this point was another huge relief to me. The amniotic fluid was also no longer in the danger zone - thanks to my body being pumped with tons of fluid via the IV. In addition, the concerns about the baby being too small were put to rest.
The other good news from yesterday was that my body was rehydrated enough that I was able to be taken off the IV fluids. It feels very nice not to be hooked up to a pole and to be able to move about more freely. It also means I'll get to take a shower this morning - just another little blessing to be thankful for. Sometimes it is easy to take little things like jumping into the shower for granted until you can't do it for awhile!
I've been getting such great care here and have a special new appreciation for nurses and all they do. I most certainly could never do a job which seems to be mostly dealing with other people's bodily fluids all day long! It's one thing to be someone's mother and do it, it's entirely another to be caring for someone who you just walked in the door and met for the first time. I've been trying to make sure and help them out as much as is possible because the last thing I want to do is make their day any harder than it already is!
My sisters are doing an exceptional job running things at home and keeping Kathrynne happy. I'm so grateful they can be here for a few days. I'm missing Kathrynne terribly, though. This is the first time I've ever been away from her for longer than a few hours and we've never left her overnight. She came up here for a little while yesterday which was wonderful, but my mommy heart could hardly stand to see her leave. She's done really well, though, but last night it started hitting her, I think, as she called me up before she went to bed and said in a very morose little tone, "I miss you, Mommy. I want you to come home, Mommy." I've never more wished I could be in two places at one time!
In between all the tests and procedures, I've been doing some reading and actually finishing a few books. Yesterday I finished Barbara Curtis' book, Lord, Please Meet Me in the Laundry Room. That was a great read - especially the first few chapters on communing with and fellowshipping with the Lord all day long as you go about your daily tasks. Who says the laundry room can't be a prayer room?!
Jesse and I also have gotten to spend a lot of quality time together here at the hospital - just the two of us - which is a real rarity. We had fun watching the Republican presidential debate together last night and making lots of running commentary and remarks of disapproval sprinkled with a few "Amens" here and there. Of course, we ended up getting into lots of interesting and hearty discussions along the way - which is always a wonderful thing! (I won't open up that can of worms any further here, but will direct you to Caleb's blog for lots of thought-provoking commentary on the debate.)
They are currently running more lab work and waiting on some further test results and then the doctors will be consulting and deciding exactly what route to take from here on out. There are many different possibilities right now and many things up in the air. I'm hoping to maybe get to go home in the next day or so and just be closely monitored, but I want to do what is best for my body and for the baby, so if that means staying here for awhile, I want to be content with that as well. Everything is in a holding pattern right now, and I'm learning to be patient and flexible, take it one hour at a time, and not worry about tomorrow.
Thank you again for your many prayers.
First off, I want to say thank you so very much for praying, for caring, for emailing, for the many offers to help... I can't tell you how much it means to us. I woke up yesterday feeling very needy - not only was I physically exhausted since my body is severely lacking in energy - but emotionally and spiritually I was feeling great need. The uncertainty, the "what-ifs," and the possibility that I could have some potentially very dangerous and life-altering condition was not very heartening to me, especially as a young mom. I slept very little and prayed a lot Monday night. God brought many Scriptures to mind which were a great comfort and I wrestled to fully and completely cast my burdens and cares upon Him. It is one thing to say He is Sovereign and trustworthy, but to live it - in the face of difficulty - is where the rubber meets the road.
After sharing on my blog and in my email newsletter yesterday morning and requesting prayer, it was only a few hours before God completely lifted the burdens and weariness from my heart. Maybe nothing had changed physically, but I had complete peace in my heart. I know this peace and assurance is only the result of God's grace and many prayers on my behalf. So, thank you, from the bottom of my heart.
We spent most of yesterday running more tests and more tests. None of the tests gave any clear answers as to why my platelet count and hemoglobin is so low and continuing to drop. I have been officially dubbed the "perplexing case" on this floor and have everyone stumped. In spite of this, the good news is that they were able to rule out many, many potential diseases, problems, and so forth yesterday - which was highly encouraging and a great relief to me. I told my mom last night that in addition to ruling out so many of the major diseases we were concerned might be the cause of my problems, we've found out that I'm quite a healthy person since I've had just about every internal organ checked in my body for every problem imaginable and nothing abnormal is turning up. I suppose that's nice to know! :)
After hours of tests, they called in the perinatologist to help with my case. We had a sonogram and consultation with him yesterday afternoon and there was more good news to report, namely, that the baby is very healthy and just exactly at the size and stage he or she is supposed to be for 36 weeks. As some of you know, there had been some earlier concerns with our sonogram at 18 weeks and the cysts which showed up in the baby's brain. Though we were told we probably had nothing to worry about there, getting the reassurance that everything was healthy at this point was another huge relief to me. The amniotic fluid was also no longer in the danger zone - thanks to my body being pumped with tons of fluid via the IV. In addition, the concerns about the baby being too small were put to rest.
The other good news from yesterday was that my body was rehydrated enough that I was able to be taken off the IV fluids. It feels very nice not to be hooked up to a pole and to be able to move about more freely. It also means I'll get to take a shower this morning - just another little blessing to be thankful for. Sometimes it is easy to take little things like jumping into the shower for granted until you can't do it for awhile!
I've been getting such great care here and have a special new appreciation for nurses and all they do. I most certainly could never do a job which seems to be mostly dealing with other people's bodily fluids all day long! It's one thing to be someone's mother and do it, it's entirely another to be caring for someone who you just walked in the door and met for the first time. I've been trying to make sure and help them out as much as is possible because the last thing I want to do is make their day any harder than it already is!
My sisters are doing an exceptional job running things at home and keeping Kathrynne happy. I'm so grateful they can be here for a few days. I'm missing Kathrynne terribly, though. This is the first time I've ever been away from her for longer than a few hours and we've never left her overnight. She came up here for a little while yesterday which was wonderful, but my mommy heart could hardly stand to see her leave. She's done really well, though, but last night it started hitting her, I think, as she called me up before she went to bed and said in a very morose little tone, "I miss you, Mommy. I want you to come home, Mommy." I've never more wished I could be in two places at one time!
In between all the tests and procedures, I've been doing some reading and actually finishing a few books. Yesterday I finished Barbara Curtis' book, Lord, Please Meet Me in the Laundry Room. That was a great read - especially the first few chapters on communing with and fellowshipping with the Lord all day long as you go about your daily tasks. Who says the laundry room can't be a prayer room?!
Jesse and I also have gotten to spend a lot of quality time together here at the hospital - just the two of us - which is a real rarity. We had fun watching the Republican presidential debate together last night and making lots of running commentary and remarks of disapproval sprinkled with a few "Amens" here and there. Of course, we ended up getting into lots of interesting and hearty discussions along the way - which is always a wonderful thing! (I won't open up that can of worms any further here, but will direct you to Caleb's blog for lots of thought-provoking commentary on the debate.)
They are currently running more lab work and waiting on some further test results and then the doctors will be consulting and deciding exactly what route to take from here on out. There are many different possibilities right now and many things up in the air. I'm hoping to maybe get to go home in the next day or so and just be closely monitored, but I want to do what is best for my body and for the baby, so if that means staying here for awhile, I want to be content with that as well. Everything is in a holding pattern right now, and I'm learning to be patient and flexible, take it one hour at a time, and not worry about tomorrow.
Thank you again for your many prayers.
posted by Crystal Paine at 7:32 AM
25 Comments:
Thank you for your update. That is encouraging that the baby is doing so well and that they are ruling out a lot of things for you. You are in my prayers. As for the debate, my husband asked last night, isn't there a debate tonight? I said, I don't know, didn't they just have one? Shows how out of the loop I am! I am so thankful that the Lord is blessing you with peace, time with your husband, getting off IVs, etc.
I have been thinking of you the past day or two and praying earnestly. I can relate to alot of what you are going through. With my last birth, I had to be admitted to the hospital early, be hooked up to IVs and a fetal monitor which basically made moving around impossible. I was stuck in bed for two days and it was the pits! :-) I think more than my discomfort, though, was having to be away from my little boy and it was difficult to keep the tears back, especially when I was already so stressed and worried about the baby inside, too. I think the best thing to do is to just cry when you feel like it. Crying is actually very cleansing and healing! I was so worried about staying strong and not crumbling that it made it worse.
It sounds like you have a great support system and hopeful attitude. Keep trusting Him--and yes, it does feel wonderful to take a shower, doesn't it??? :-)
Dear Crystal,
so thankful for the update! i was hoping you were going to post this morning! Continuing to pray and thank God for His mercies!
blessings,
Jen in al
Crystal,
I will definitely be praying for all of you. Oh, and I have no doubts that you will be a beautiful witness for the Lord to all that you come into contact with there. The glory and the beauty of the Lord and your desire to serve and honor Him have always shown through in you and all that you do with your blog and other forms of ministry. Thanks so much for all that you do for Him and us!
Love & Blessings,
(: Amanda :)
www.homeschoolblogger.com/amandasangels
(Fellow member of YoungMothers&Wives on Yahoo)
So glad to hear that you are doing better!
Crystal,
I have not introduced myself, but I am a fairly new lurker here and have decided to come out to let you know that I'm also thinking about you and praying for you, and your family.
Thank God, today is a better day! I'm sure you've touched lives there at the hospital and have ministered to hearts more than you'll know.
I plead the blood of Jesus over you and the baby and your young family. I pray that no weapon formed against you will ever prosper, in Jesus' name. You have an awesome testimony, and you will come out strong and victorious!
Love you,
Florita of Yielded Heart
I'm glad nothing abnormal has been found, Crystal. I will keep praying for you and your baby.
Hi Crystal,
We've had a busy couple of days so I'm just now catching up on the recent events in your life. I'm so sorry to hear of your hospitalization. I pray that your doctors will be able to find the answer as to what is causing you to so ill. May you feel the presence of God during this difficult time.
Thank you so much for the update! I've been praying for you again and again as you and your sweet family come to mind throughout the day!! I will continue to pray for more wonderful news. I'll also pray that this baby will arrive happy and healthy and this trial will quickly become a distant memory!
Thanks for the update. Still praying!
Just lifted you and your sweet family up in prayer. Hope to hear that you are going home SOON!!
Jennifer R.
What a blessing to know all of your organs are strong and healthy! And I am glad your baby is healthy too. I just want to let you know what a breath of fresh air you are - I have had family members in and out of the hospital for the last several years and so often, sickness causes them to despair. Though they claim to be Christians they have no understanding of the peace that comes with knowing you are in good hands at all times - God's hands. I will pray Psalm 1 for you - you seem to be a woman who meditates on the Word day and night, and so the promise is that you will be like a tree planted by streams of water, who is unmoved when calamity hits. Everything is going to be okay. So much of life has to do with trusting God with all of the uncertainties each day brings - but just remember that you are his child, and that He will not withhold ANYTHING good from you. When you ask for a loaf of bread, He will not give you a stone. When you ask for a fish, He will not give you a serpant. He knows how to give good things to those who ask. You are covered in the Righteousness of Christ and are therefore precious in His sight, and He is causing all things to work together for your very, very best. You are friends with the Prince of Peace, and you know that as all of these people all over the world lift your name up to the throne of grace, Jesus Christ Himself is mediating for them with the Father on your behalf. The Holy Spirit Himself intercedes for all of these prayers with groanings too deep for words. The Trinity is working day and night on your behalf- it is well!
You are in my prayers,
C
I am glad to hear soem major things were ruled out and you seem to be a little more settled. Although I know the hospital isn't the funnest you are finding the little things to be thankful for and positive. Kudos to you. Continued prayers your way!
Chrissy T
Hope to hear good news very soon--you are in my prayers! Try to rest as much as possible. One thing that really made my hospital stays more bearable was having my husband bring in some healthy food snacks to balance out the food that was served there. My favorites were cubed melon, grapes, nuts, wheat crackers, etc. and of course, I had to have my favorite tea! Hopefully you are being able to eat to keep your strength up and nourish that little one that will be arriving before you know it. Take care!
All I can say is to make the most of this rest time while you can! I know from experience that being hospitalized is not fun in the least, but it's so good that you have a very knowledgeable midwife that was able to pick up on a problem quickly. Hopefully the extra fluids and rest will make a big difference today, as I remember how hard it is to be away from home and a little one. :-)
Glad that you and baby are doing well.As a labor and delivery RN,it warmed my heart to read your positive comment on the nursing care that you are getting.Many times it seems that the message is portrayed that women should not be educated outside of the homeschool realm or work outside the home,however,SOMEONE has to be at the hospital to take care of people and we all want an educated and Christian person on the other side of the bed.Nursing is a wonderful profession and one that you can certainly witness to others in.Thank you, again, for recognizing the importance of the nurse.It is not an easy profession but an honorable one,I feel.It had provided for our family quite nicely and I am proud to be an RN, a Christian and yes, a working mother. Blessings and the prayers continue for you and your family.
So glad to hear the update Crystal, glad the doctors have been able to rule out lots of worrying conditions. I really admire your example in this - wanting to be a blessings to the nurses, finding the blessings and positives in your situation, etc. In times of trouble it can be so easy to focus on the negative and just worry, but God bless you that you are seeing and appreciating the positive things :).
I really pray that the doctors discover what is wrong very soon, so you are able to go home to your dear daughter. Blessings to you and your family! Keep trusting in God, He is always faithful!
I am so glad that you update everyone while you are in the hospital. Please know that MANY people are praying and also know that we will STILL pray even if you aren't able to update for some reason.
His,
Mrs. U
I am praying for you! Hang in there. I am so sorry that you have to be in the hospital, I know that it is not fun. God bless.
Kimi
What a blessing to hear how God is answering the abundant prayers on your behalf. Thank you for the update. It was an encouragement to me.
Also, I wanted to commend you for being a godly witness to the nurses and staff. When I work I can usually tell when a patient or family members are genuine Christians. They are such pleasant people compared to many others.
I just thought I would mention something that greatly eased my spirit when I had my last surgery (Mar. 2004). I loved hearing uplifting, beautiful sacred music on CD. It greatly helped put me at peace. Several families loaned me some of their favorites and brought me a CD player. My room was always filled with beautiful music. I think that was a huge witness to the staff too. Maybe you would enjoy that. Just an idea. :)
I sure wish I could be closer to do something more. I will continue praying fervently for you and your dear family. So glad to hear the positive reports thus far. Know that you are in all our prayers. God bless you mightily.
~Lydia
Crystal, I am new to the blogging world. Just created my blog. I have been reading yours for some time and have ordered e books from you. You are such an inspiration for women and especially young mothers. Your blog started me on a much needed spiritual renewal. I wanted to let you know I am praying for you and I hope that the doctors find out what is going on so that you can get home to Kathryn soon. I know that God is looking after you and your baby. Your faith in God is awesome and you are such a trusting young Christian woman. I hope that others can learn from your example and witness.
Glad to read the update! You have been in my thoughts and prayers and will continue to be so.
Praying here for you!
I have to wholeheartedly agree with your praise of the nursing staff at the hospital where you are. I had an awesome experience with the nurses that attended me during the labor and delivery of both my children. They were so kind and helpful and went out of there way to make me as comfortable as possible through two LONG labors and extended hospital stays. If God had not led me to be a stay at home mom, it would have been an honor to be serving in the medical field as a nurse. The doctors often times get all the glory for their five minutes of presence during a delivery, but it's really the nurses who do the majority of the work! A big thanks to all the nurses out there who strive to make our hospital stays as nice as possible.
Hi Crystal,
I've been out of town and just got to check in and found out what's going on. I'm sorry you're in the hospital!
You can probably ask for an additional egg crate mattress to make your bed more comfy. Also, when te nurses or docs come in and casually ask you if there is anything they can do to make things more comfortable for you, ask "Whadda ya got?" ;) When I was on bedrest in the hospital for a long time while pregnant with our 4th child I started asking that, and found out lots of things they had available that I would not have known to ask for. They forget that the patients do not know what they've got that you*could* ask for!
I will be praying for you, and will add you to our prayer list in the kitchen. We look at it all the time and pray for our list people at meals, etc.
Hugs!
I have been keeping you in prayer, even before I knew about this. God is so good. I will continue to pray for you.
I was hospitalized when pregnant with my daughter at 25 weeks. She is about the same age as your daughter, part of why I read your blog with interest. God was so good to bless me with a healthy fullterm delivery.
The song that the Lord brought into my head during that lonely night in the hospital was:
You are my hiding place
You always fill my heart
With songs of deliverance
Whenever I am afraid
I will trust in you
I will trust in you
Let the weak say I am strong in the strength of the Lord.
As the Psalm says, I pray you he will fill your heart and strengthen you as you hide in him.
God's blessings!!
Julia
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