Girls Gone Mild
While skimpy clothes still dominate the fashion scene, today there's a flip side to girls gone wild.
Call it "girls gone mild" - a building modesty movement among many young women.
"The young girls themselves, they are the ones leading the modesty revolution," said author Wendy Shalit.
The "modest fashion" these girls wear may not be to everyone's taste, but most looks are straight off the catwalk.
A slick new magazine Eliza caters to the modest dresser. Shalit said the thousands of young women she'd heard from wanted to fit in and be cool, just not trashy.
I am sick. and. tired. of seeing so much skin this summer. And we don't even go near public pools, I'm talking about the indecency you are exposed to going to the grocery store these days. So I'm grateful to see any trend towards modesty.
In reading the above article, though, I had to wonder whether a modesty revolution that encourages girls to "fit in and be cool" is really that great of a thing. I'm all for people wearing a bit more fabric (or, in many cases, more than a bit more!) and definitely am not advocating a frumpy appearance, but should our goal be to "fit in and be cool"? Is that what we want our daughters' goal in clothing to be?
What do you think?
posted by Crystal Paine at 4:32 PM
42 Comments:
I completely agree with you. Our first priority should be to dress distinctly femininly and modestly. And in doing so, if we happen to look "stylish" so be it, but that should definitely not be our goal.
If you can be stylish while wearing appropriate clothing, staying within your budget and wearing things that you actually enjoy and not spending an inordinate amount of time "fussing with yourself" ... there is absolutely nothing wrong with it.
I, too, am SICK of seeing half dressed people everywhere. And, it doesn't seem to be limited to women! I've seen plenty of men in need of some more coverage. I'm all for more modest dressing, but feel it should be for the right reason, not just to advance the latest "style." Unfortunately, the powers that be will advance this new modest trend with their eye on the bottom line. Money talks. How sad.
There was a piece on Fox News today about the shift to modesty as well. Nice to see it getting some press.
I agree! I love the modesty movement. I substitute teach and there were times when my JAW WOULD DROP when I saw what kids, esp. girls, were wearing. There was one kindergardener who was wearing a mini skirt, little heals, and more makeup than I wore on my wedding day. I said something to another teacher about it being a dress up day, and she said no, that girl shows up like that every day. *faints*
Webster's definition of modesty is "not vain or boastful" so modesty does not necessarily equal not showing skin. Something with spaghetti straps may be considered modest to some.
I'm trying to teach my daughter to pay attention to the message girls may be sending out with the clothing they wear. Are they "boasting" about a particular body part. We also talk about being girly verses not wanting to be "sexy" I think it's important to teach our daughters that their worth is not about their body and how it looks but about their heart. Girls today put too much emphasis on selling the "package" Everything is about what they wear and how they look. When train up our daughters to guard their hearts, then it follows that they won't care so much about being cool and fitting in. But nothing wrong with a little bit of cool and fitting in either as long as we know the heart is right.
Check this site out. I think you will be wonderfully happy... http://www.purefashion.com It's a christian fashion doobie, and their stuff is just beautiful... while still following strict guidlines (necklines must be no more than 4 finger widths below the collar bone, shorts must be longer than your shortest finger if your arms are straight by your sides etc. etc.) Just lovely. And in no way drab of frumpy at all!
Why arent parents taking control of their children's wardrobes? There were a couple of comments regarding the article by mom's who were thrilled to hear of this new movement. It's the parents respnsiblity in the first place to provide decent modest clothing for their girls. There is modest clothing hanging on the racks in dept stores for sale. People act like the only thing for sale is crop tops and shorts that are short enough to be underware. Life is about choices, just because everyone else is showing extravagant amts of skin doesnt mean we are obligated to follow along.
One of the important and often overlooked definitions of modesty is that modest means not drawing attention to yourself. In this way of looking at it, as long as the apparel itself is not immodest, being stylish is a nice plus. Not wanting to "stand out" is not necessarily a bad motivation. It could be but it doesn't have to be.
I've read Shalit's book and it is wonderful and encouraging. Of course I don't agree with everything she says or believes but it's still a nice change of pace in today's world.
I think it's a great thing! There's a difference between chasing the latest fads (which never brings satisfaction) and dressing in a way that is attractive and makes you feel stylish and more confident.
I want my children to understand the importance of appearance. Modesty is paramount, as being a commandment AND a primary component of the image the world sees.
The way we dress is quite often the first thing a person notices. I don't think that style should be an "if it happens, that's okay but it's not at all important" part of our life. Dressing attractively and stylishly helps me to remember that I have a divine heritage and important responsibilities as a daughter of God.
Some mothers make excuses for not taking the time to look as nice as they once did. At times I have you dressed the children in adorable outfits when I'm wearing clothes that are stained, don't fit, or are outdated. Even if they're modest, if they're unattractive or ill-fitting, I don't think they help me to share the gospel of Christ and to glorify God.
I have to agree. And, you have to ask yourself by who's standards would you be "cool". If a young girl starts down that path of "trendy and cool" eventually where will it lead? Who's opinion will come to matter to her?
I personally choose clothing that is classic and tasteful, not trendy, at least not deliberately - if a style happens to be "in", so be it, but I try to avoid the "style of the moment" if I can.
Out of curiosity, I took a look at the Eliza Magazine website. On the "About Us" page, they describe their mission thusly:
"Created for women who want to be stylish, sexy, and engaged in the world while retaining high standards in dress, entertainment and lifestyle."
Sexy? In our everyday dress? Sorry, but I only desire to be thought of as "sexy" by my husband, and only in the privacy of our own home. And, as a Christian, I am called, not to be "engaged in the world", but engaged in the work of spreading the gospel to the world.
I say this with no judgement on the individuals involved in this magazine, nor with any malice whatsoever, however, modest fashions aside, There is still a strong element of worldliness and the "Me Philosophy" in the photos and tone of this website, and, I imagine, the magazine as a whole. Sadly, this magazine appears to have little, if anything to do with Christian values - it is modesty for modesty's sake, not for the glory of God. As the wife of a Youth Pastor, I could not in good conscience steer the young women of our church toward this, while expecting them to learn the biblical principles of "shamefacedness and sobriety".
Whether modest or immodest, fashion is an idol to the majority of women and girls of the world, and I personally feel it is best to direct our thoughts away from fashion.
I have two tops that are designed by the Shade company that is mentioned in the artcle. While I love the fact that I can wear my old clothes modestly now (they are tanks with a higher neckline and longer length that I wear under my regular shirts) I have been pondering some things about some of the clothing sold by this company. While the clothing is "modest" by the modern cultural standards, most shirts that they sell are skin tight and well, sexy. Don't get me wrong, sexy isn't a bad thing...in the bedroom with your husband. But although there is no cleavage or midsection showing, the shirts are still very provocative. What's underneath isn't so much a secret, ya know? A woman's goal should be to dress modestly to glorify God, and honor her husband. Wearing clingy clothing, even though it doesn't show breasts or tummy, doesn't accomplish either thing. Oh, it's an attitude too. A woman can wear modest clothing, but if she had a provocative, lustful attitude about her, and displayed certain body language, then she could accomplish the same thing as showing her body.
Tammy
www.xanga.com/fulltimemomto2
I believe every facet of our being belongs to our Lord.We should model self respect and teach our children to see the great worth God sees in them.
I also believe it is the Holy Spirit's job to teach us all things.From our clothing style to makeup and the way we treat ourselves and others.
It is a fleshly matter when we find ourselves running after every trend and fad.We are ambassadors for Christ;that simply means we are sent to reconcile the world back to God.Can we do that and still look pleasant and timely? You better believe it--the Holy Spirit will teach us how if we listen to Him instead of magazines and TV.
Well...I stick to JCrew, Lands' End, LLBean, and the like for clothing for me. Classic tailoring, classic styles, and good quality clothing never goes out of 'style.' While my husband bemoans the fact that I live in turtlnecks come winter (come on! This is Wisconsin: its COLD here!), he does make comments that he appreciates how I dress, and that I'm not causing folks to stare.
While I think this whole "movement" is great, I agree with PersistentPat - money talks, and this is just another way retailers will rake it in. Sometimes I feel like 'dressing modestly' becomes FAR too much of an idol for many Christian women - it becomes an easy way for us to judge one another's level of 'Christianness', and that is never right. You'll never ever catch me wearing a dress or a skirt unless I have to - just really hate them for the most part. But I still dress tastefully, femininely, with one goal in mind: that I am first and foremost glorifying Christ. Making my clothing an idol is never a good thing, regardless of whether I'm wearing a swimsuit (which I actually bought this year for the first time in about 3- couldn't bear the thought of being pregnant and hot!), or a turtleneck and jeans.
This 'movement' would be so much more influential if Christians were more vocal about it :) Right now, many people equate modest dressing with long skirts, head coverings, and frumpy tops. We can be so much more than the stereotype...honestly.
This is a great topic! I often go back & forth w/this issue myself.
While I totally agree that we should be modest and decent when it comes to clothing and our appearance, I do think it is a good idea to keep up w/current styles for a few reasons. First, I know everyone is different, but my husband definitely appreciates a trendy outfit once in a while...certainly not something low cut or some sort of mini-skirt, but something stylish always makes him say something complementary.
Second, I think that when it comes to witnessing to other women who don't know Christ, having the appearance of someone who is very different is not helpful. I'm not saying that you need to look like a fashion-plate, but when we look like we are totally out of touch w/society, our testimony can be easily written off as obsolete too.
Like I said though, sometimes I go back & forth on this issue. How far do you go to "fit in" so as to make your message more attractive? It is a fine line for sure. It is easy to begin comparing yourself to other women and focus too much on appearance, which is certainly not a good thing.
Two things I am sick to death of seeing is cleavage and tops that a few years ago would have been considered a camisole or lingerie!
Personally, I believe modesty (or being discreet with one's body) should appeal to a sensible young woman accross the board, reguardless of spiritual inclination. However, I'm a bit tired of hearing Christian young ladies exclaim with relief, "Oh, finally I can get modest clothes!" As if there were no modest clothes before, and they had no choice but wear immodest ones. Christians ladies can enjoy the new trend, but this is more than just respecting yourself, like secular modesty professes. It's about respecting God's creation and His way, and taking the power He gave us and using it in the way He intended. It's a conviction.
Give it five years, The fashion pendulum will swing the other way, and unfortunantly there will be a lot of fritter-headed little Christian girls who go about in the new styles, thinking they HAVE to wear those things because dressing modestly is a preference, but FASHION is the conviction!
I read about this book on Amazon recently. For the most part, I think it is a positive thing to encourage modest dress and provide it for women. I tend to agree that our first priority should not be to look "cool and trendy."
I think, ultimately, Christians need to get back to understanding the foundation for why we wear clothing in the first place. We need to have the right "doctrine of clothing" so to speak. Remember that clothing was not man's idea but God's after the fall of Adam and Eve. After Adam tried to clothe himself and his wife with fig leaves, because of his shame, God stepped in and created coats of skin for them. An animal had to be killed for them to have proper clothing. This is NOT to say we should only wear animal skins (leather & wool) but rather the act of blood being shed for Adam and Eve's sin was to point toward Christ as being the perfect sacrifice to atone for the sins of mankind.
But back to why we wear clothing: God commands it and instituted its practice.
This should be the foundation for why we wear clothing, not the climate nor the culture. The book, "Modesty and the Public Undressing of America" delves into these concepts further.
Having said coolness and trendiness should not be the first priority, one thing I would like to see more is Christian women who dress like they are daughters of the King. I think it is disgraceful to see women who dress in "ugly clothes" and claim to be followers of Christ. Not necessarily because they are sinning by what they wear but their message to those around them is something like: "To be a Christian you must not respect yourself anymore. You must give up clothing that says anything to good taste or design. God desires us to look like beggars and paupers rather than his dear, precious children."
I find this very sad. Now, do I sometimes judge someone in this way? Well, probably yes, more often than I care to admit. But the point is that if we are daughters of the King of Kings we need to show it by our action, words, and yes, outward image. I don't think a woman has to be "trendy or cool" to do this but a few lessons in color combinations, cuts for different body types and proportion for size go along way in helping her look like a respectable, honorable woman of God rather than a common day laborer.
One more thing: a woman can actually dress immodestly by wearing clothing that causes her to stand out as a pauper from those around her. Culture also plays a role in modest dress. If we all wore dresses all the time like those of a by-gone era we would stand out unnecessarily from other women. It's fine for particular occasions but everyday dress seems silly and unnecessary.
Anyway, those are a few of my thoughts concerning modest dress. I don't mean to step on anyones toes and I had no particular person in mind as I wrote this. Just a few observations I have made over the years. :)
I never was one to not dress with some modesty. I used to wear jeans and alot of slacks. Then something changed about 3 years ago. I decided that I only wanted to wear long skirts, all year around. I don't wear pants or jeans anymore. (Please don't get me wrong, I have nothing against women who do). I found that in dressing in skirts and dresses made me feel more feminine, made me feel more comfortable, and my sense of self worth and pride shifted. I find that I gain more respect out in public in my dealings with men. I want to be modest for myself, because of how I feel inside. Not just for my dedication to God or my faith.
And I too, am very tired of seeing women who wear very little. I welcome this modesty trend, whether it is considered to be a cool thing to fit in or what have you. Anything that can show young women right now, that they do not have to bare their skin and be "sexy" at young ages is welcomed with big open arms by me.
I would be SO happy to pass by the girl clothing in target, and not see short shorts, crop tops, and mini skirts.
While I believe that modesty needs to be taught to children, by the parents, from childhood, surely a bit of positive peer group pressure(as opposed to negative) couldn't hurt.
Claire
I don't mind it if Christian girls are dressing in a stylish manner, if modest clothes are in style. Just so long as when the modest clothes go out of style, they continue to dress modestly.
And, obviously, I'm all for the general fashion trend that has all girls dressing modestly!
Most people live in a town...with a thrift store...or two...or three! There are tons of modest clothing in their waiting for an eager Christian to be taken home and worn. After I got saved and God dealt with my heart on modesty, the thrift stores are the first places I hit. Got some basic skirts and dresses and tops to start me out and as finances got better and my taste in certain styles of skirts changed, I also was able to find a few modest items at WalMart and Cato's.
Over the years, WalMart has been getting better with supplying more longer skirts and tops. I like that.
Of course, if one doesn't have a thrift store near by, goodness, there is always the Internet. I have gotten some lovely gingham / checked dresses from eBay for practically nothing!
So, yeah...modest clothes are out there..it just takes some common sense on where to find them. The opportunities are endless though.
I dont know anything on fashion or being 'in style' or whatever the term is, nor do I care.
I dress to please the Lord, not the world. If they don't like what I wear, they can look away. I am sure in their minds they think "that poor girl..she really needs to get with the times"...LOL.
There is such freedom in not pleasing everyone around me with wearing what they are wearing.
I know it's sweltering hot in some places right now...even in Germany we had a few hot days where I though I would melt..LOL. But we shouldn't let the weather dictate our fashion. Of course seeing the half naked people bothers me as well. I wonder...what's wrong with just a pair of jeans and a tee shirt, why can't they wear that instead of a bra top and barely there shorts????? *sigh*
Even the larger ladies squeeze themselves into these items and it's just quite scary all around...LOL. I know people have mirrors in their houses....
I am sorry, I don't think we have to look like everyone else to witness to them. I wear a cape dress and headcovering and that in itself has opened the door to many wonderful opportunites to share the Gospel. Many times...
I am a Christian, I am different. I am not to look like the world.
If you feel a cape dress / jumper and headcovering is frumpy...I am sorry. Don't know where frumpy comes into looking like a lady.
I totally agree Crystal that we SHOULD NOT be teaching our daughter’s to fit in; in any way. Especially not with their clothing choices. I praise the Lord that I had parents who never taught me what a “name brand” or “the in clothes” were. Hee. Hee.
However, I’m THRILLED with the new trend towards churches teaching about modesty (finally!) and I’m praying the Lord does a mighty work in this department. In fact, I just wrote a post about this a few days ago. I believe that there are so many young ladies who have never been “shown” how to dress modestly. Many of them have a heart to be strong for the Lord in their youth, but don’t have any “older women” teaching them. It’s so sad.
I have found that by showing girls that clothes can be fun, yet modest, they are more open to a change. Mostly though, they need some older women who are leading by example.
Girls gone mild with a heart of stone portrayed via the world's clothing industry(really simply girls gone wild wearing a mask of hypocrisy) just can't measure up to girls gone righteous and a heart of flesh reflected in outward appearance. Polar opposites.
We're seeing a trend that will cycle back around because the motive of profit dictates it always has(who hasn't seen a vintage movie or remembered real life with femininely modest garments on females portraying attitudes and actions that didn't match Godly femininity or modesty?). People(impressionable teens and those seasoned a bit in age alike) too often run on peer pressure/acceptance and finding sastisfaction in all the wrong externals and celebrity examples; fashion designers line runways and merchants stock shelves and hangers to feed that and then some.
It is refreshing to see Christians design and/or sew for their families or design and/or sew for sale for the benefit of those that can't design or sew their own ~ for the glory of God(at frugal prices, too). If it doesn't flow from the love of God and love of others and self decreasing, well it isn't all as wonderful as it should be any more than the way the world does it is.
Crystal,
There is nothing inherently wrong with making a (modest) nod to current standards of beauty.
Wendy Shalit (the author featured here) is a wonderful example of true modesty. When I have seen Wendy speak in public, she wears a lovely, fitted and streamlined black jersey jewel-neck top and a long skirt. She looks stylish! And she is at the same time in perfect cooperation with orthodox Judaism's rigorous standards. (She also refuses to shake men's hands. The *only men who can touch her are her father, brothers, and husband)
On the other hand, Wendy was once handed a "crown of virtue" to wear at a conference by a rather silly fan. Wendy graciously thanked the lady and put the crown aside. She knew that wearing it would not be modest because it would make her conspicuous. In the same way, standing out of the crowd too much- by refusing to pay any attention to fashion whatsoever- may be a kind of immodesty because we are making ourselves conspicuous.
It's not just lack of modesty that bothers me, it's how sloppy and ugly people dress these days. I'm old enough to be most of your reader's mother or grandmother and I can remember when people actually dressed with care. I doubt that many want to go back to the hats and gloves that I wore but for goodness sakes, ripped jeans and tank tops are just plain ugly.
This is a difficult issue (good one, Crystal). I think that there are several components to the issue and how we should make our decisions as to what is appropriate.
First, I want to glorify God in all that I do, and to be sure that my heart is in the right place, not desiring to bring attention to myself, not to feed my own vanity, not to fit in with the rest of the world.
Secondly, I think it's important to make sure that my clothing choices truly are modest, not simply covering major body parts or skin, as another poster mentioned. I've seen young women at my church wear items that may technically be considered "modest" because they do not show cleavage, etc. but their overall style is alluring and intended to draw attention (and draw attention it does!).
But third, I agree with megmarc that too often Christian modesty is viewed as out of date, and quite honestly, many women look rather frumpy. I really think that this hampers our ability to develop relationships and be considered relevant and worth listening to by many of those to whom we are witnessing. I do not need to be particularly trendy or stylish, nor will I bow to the fashion of the day, but it is good to be current and remain modest and feminine within those boundaries.
Also, my husband works long days in the business sector in a large city, and he frequently tells me how important it is for him to come home to a attractive and somewhat stylish wife. When he is bombarded with incredibly immodest and alluring images all day long, it is my responsibility to help him in his pursuit of purity and fidelity by making sure that he comes home to a wife that helps him put those images out of his mind. While this is partly done in the privacy of our bedroom, I think that it should also be done day to day, even when "sexiness" is not my goal, but rather to present to him an appearance of loveliness that says "I care about you, and purity is something we pursue together".
While fashion should never become our goal, let's not throw the baby out with the bathwater and forget that one of the ways that God made women in His image was through their God-given beauty!
Considering that Shallit is an Orthodox Jew, from what perspective did you expect her to come? For her, its law. And if telling girls to "fit in and be cool",while at the same time encouraging them to be modest and appropriate, then, frankly, I think that's a good thing. She's not coming from a Christian perspective and I don't think we can or even should expect unbelievers to view modesty in the same way we do.
And since when should we, as Christian, not try to fit in? Meaning, we still have a foot in this world. Being different doesn't have to mean being an outcast.
I agree that we should take a second look at "fitting in and being cool". I have found that most people dress to please. Who are we trying to please, the culture? those we hang out with? the people we admire? ourselves? Or are we seeking-as we should in all things-to please God? I believe also there is often pride in being pretty so many women and girls want to show it off. Is that a godly attitude? Another thing is by dressing a certain way we often convey who we admire and look up to. For many girls that is Hollywood stars or rock stars and their dress mimics those people. We really do need to search our hearts and see if we are sincerely motivated by seeking God's glory in the area of dress. "For ye are bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body, and in your spirit, which are God's."
(1Corinthians 6:20)
Lydia
Sometimes when I see how women dress during summer, I wonder: do they have a mirror at home? And if yes, do they bother to throw a glance at it? Having your underwear hanging out can't be justified by any kind of heat. It's just plain rude.
I dress modestly and love being stylish. But if there was no modest, stylish AND affordable choice for me, I admit I'd rather be Miss Frumpy than have all of my 'endowments' spilling out.
First, very well-written article! I am so impressed with what I read on this blog and by what I read on blogs you link!
The one thought that keeps coming to mind is "does the word feminist" really have meaning anymore? In all honesty, there are some things associated with feminism that I support (equal pay for equal work, access to education and jobs, equality before the law, etc), but there is so much that I don't (pro-abortion, anti-marriage self-centeredness, etc). I used to consider myself a "feminist", but over the past few years I really feel that the word has no meaning and too many negative connotations. If you have to define what you mean when you are a "feminist," does the word really have any value? It seems like the word requires too many qualifiers to be of much use. “Oh, I’m a feminist, but I’m not like Linda Hirschman or Simone de Beauvoir. To me, it is a word without a true meaning.
Mrs. H
IMHO: There is a lot of peer pressure on young girls these days. No matter their heart, it is tough to *not* fit in. If there is modest clothing out there for young girls that is stylish, all the better. Out in the world, in schools, girls can be vicious, mean and downright hurtful. I think if you can find modest AND stylish clothes for your young girl to wear and it makes her feel good about herself to wear it and not stand out, all the better. I know many of you homeschool your children, which I believe is a good thing. But for those who send their girls out into the public school arena, fitting in is something that helps them interact with their peers. It also can help be an example to other young girls who are confused and lost. Seeing someone their own age, modestly dressed and stylish, with God's love shining through it all, can only be a good thing and may be the only example they have of God and his love for them.
Thank you for your time in reading my humble opinion.
jules
I think the fact that Wendy Shallit won't shake hands with anyone other than father, brothers and husband makes her seem unplesant. What kind of message does that send to a man or woman who are not christian? It doesn't! It just seems strange and at best, rude.
Would she refuse to shake President Bush's hand? To me, it is suggesting that touching her is just too much for a man to handle, therefore putting something in his mind that might not have been there to begin with.
There was a rule in the past that a woman was to offer her hand first. If she didn't, then the man did not offer his. That rule would work much better than her refusal to shake hands.
I was just re-reading my post and thought something needed a little clarification. I stated, "If we all wore dresses all the time like those of a by-gone era we would stand out unnecessarily from other women. It's fine for particular occasions but everyday dress seems silly and unnecessary."
After reading it over again I thought it sounded like I was implying that women should not wear dresses or skirts everyday EXCEPT for special occasions. However, that is NOT what I was trying to say. By my comment I was referring to particular styles of dress from past eras such as Renaissance, Colonial, Regency, Victorian, etc. My point was that if a woman wore something from those sorts of styles all the time, everyday she would stand out unnecessarily from those around her. Not that women shouldn't ever wear those sorts of clothes but it can be overdone. :)
I don't have a problem with women who wear skirts or dresses every day. My own sister and mother do and while I don't practice this myself (partly out of necessity due to my job) I have no ill feelings toward women who chose to wear skirts and dresses exclusively. I recently started purchasing and wearing more skirts and dresses for everyday wear. For summer weather, skirts also seem to be much cooler than capri pants. I never wear shorts unless it is for bedtime. :)
Hope that clarifies my position a bit. I wrote my first post rather early in the morning and my brain tends not to function as well at that hour. :)
God bless all the lovely ladies who desire to please the Lord in what they wear. :)
Lydia: Thanks for clarifying. I knew what you meant but wasn't sure if everyone would have.
It was great to see you all the other day. It made us miss living down there so much and made us further resolve to pursue and earnestly pray about moving back soon. We'll see what God has in store. It's looking more hopeful, though.
Oh and it looks like we might have been convinced to make it to the Film Festival this year - thanks to your mom's encouragement. :) We're planning on it if I can work it out in the budget and if Jesse is able to get off. It's looking promising. Is your whole family going? I'll have to drop your mom an email soon about it.
I too am fed up with seeing half-dressed people everywhere! I agree that it must be possible to dress modestly without looking like a complete frump! There's nothing wrong with making an effort to look nice.
Modest trousers are particularly hard to find. I do wear trousers - I'm not 'dresses only' -but I like my trousers to go up to the waist and down to the ground. However, it's very hard to find a nice-looking pair of trousers which aren't low-slung.
I do think also that modern society pushes us to follow fashion and trends to an insane degree. It's hard for anybody (especially young girls) to resist the pressure to 'fit in'. I was flipping through a women's magazine yesterday and I came across an article that was entitled 'The World's Most Important Bags'!
I've really enjoyed reading your posts lately and looking at the lovely pictures of your family!
"I think the fact that Wendy Shallit won't shake hands with anyone other than father, brothers and husband makes her seem unplesant. What kind of message does that send to a man or woman who are not christian?"
Dear anonymous, please remember Wendy Shalit is an Orthodox Jew. An Orthodox Jew can only have physical contact with his/her spouse, parents and siblings (and some won't even touch their siblings). These are the requirements of Wendy's faith, and if explained politely, shouldn't offend anyone.
PS: In case someone misunderstands this, what I said only refers to the opposite sex, of course! :)
Hello! I'm fifteen and have worn dresses/jumpers/skirts/culottes since I was ten. Recently, the Lord has really worked on my heart to dress even more modestly. He brought a Mennonite sister into my life who helped me in this area. I now wear cape dresses most of the time and since November I've worn headcoverings. I feel like a LADY when I dress modestly. "Apparel", used in I Timothy 2:9, means "long robe". (I used a concordance. :) Also, I have such wonderful opportunities to witness for Christ. Dressing different from the world shows people that you ARE different. Thank you for your encouragement in modest dressing!
I am all for seeing women and young girls putting on more clothes.. men for that matter too..
But to fit in a be cool... um no.
God tells us to seperate ourselves from the world... and that would be in how we dress too.
I don't advocate frumpiness, but I do advocate modesty... in men and women.. and that means my children as well (4 boys, 3 girls).
My husband and I teach our children that modesty is a two way street. Men should not go around without their shirt on.. boy either. Girls need to be dressed like a girl.. not a prostitute looking thing.
I think it's better to have "fit in and be cool" kind of modesty than no modesty at all. I mean, hey, not EVERYONE is going to agree with you in the modesty area and every other area and neither SHOULD they. I believe each one should do what they believe is right for THEM. Yes, I believe in modesty. I think more people should dress more modestly than they do now a days so if it takes a fad to do it - go for it!
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