Guest Post: "Busy at Home"
Guest Post by Hope WareTitus 2: 3-5, NIV
Let us first consider the difference between "busy" and "busyness."If we have a home in perfect order, but a two-year-old that has been begging Mommy all day to read a story, then we are caught in "busyness." If your 10-year-old has to beg you to quit what you are doing on the computer to show him how to do his math equations, then we are caught in "busyness." "Busyness" will allow you to complete your "to do" list so carefully posted on your refrigerator but will not allow you to nurture those to whom the Lord has entrusted you.
Being "busy at home" will allow you to feel confident in your God-given roll of homemaker, mother, caregiver, and nurturer. "Busy" gives a feeling of peace and satisfaction. It allows a knowledge of true order--which sometimes scarcely resembles a preconceived day of "things to do."
From the phrase "busy at home," I came up with an acrostic to remind me of some things God has taught me about what it means to be "busy at home":
Building relationships
Utilizing your time
Serving others
Yielding yourself
At
Happy
Optimistic
Meek
Enthusiastic
Let's begin with building relationships - One of the primary privileges and responsibilities of a homemaker is to build relationships with those around us. This not only includes our husband and children, but also those with whom we come into contact.
I am a very content "homebody." I really, really like being at my home. We have learned to consider the opportunities that God has given us to build relationships with neighbors. We have older neighbors for whom my older boys mow their yard or take their garbage cans back up to their garage. Believe me, the very fact that you are actually staying at home, not working outside of the home, is a far bigger witness of your commitment to Christ and your family than you could ever imagine! We live in a large city where, as a stay-at-home mother, I am an enigma to most folks.
Utilizing your time - Although I've harped on being chained to a "to do" list, I really do utilize a daily plan. A plan is flexible enough to allow for life to happen. We all know that sometimes life intervenes in even the best of plans. We can react with frustration or accept that the plans have changed. You cannot predict illness in your family or in others. If you are chained to that list, you won't be able to effectively minister. You'll be too stressed out at having to change your personal plans on your list.
Serving others - I have found that a primary means of serving others while still being a keeper at home involves planning ahead. I make soup several times a week in my crock pot. About 1/2 a large crock pot will serve our
A few years ago, my boys and I prayed that God would grant us a special opportunity to minister to someone in need that week. Two days later, our neighbor mentioned that his wife was very sick. I immediately replied, "Doug, allow me to bring over some soup and homemade bread." I had just made bread that morning. I told him that he had three choices as to the kind of soup. He replied that he didn't want to trouble me. But, I assured him that the soup was all made, in the freezer and just waiting for them. I went inside and told the boys that God had answered our prayers. We prayed a special prayer over the food for our dear neighbor and thanked Him for allowing us to minister to them. Then we all took it across the street.
Yielding yourself - When you are a full-time homemaker, you must constantly yield your desires to God and place the wishes of others above your own. You can be a grouch about it, or you can do this with an attitude of joy.
The atmosphere of your home is determined by your attitude. Try it sometime. When you find yourself becoming irritated by being asked the same question for the tenth time, stop and analyze how you are responding to those around you. Then yield to the joy, which only the Holy Spirit can give you. All of a sudden, everyone else's attitude will seem to clear up. Really, it was the act of yielding that allowed the Fruit of the Spirit to manifest itself in your home that changed.
Have a happy heart - I worked outside of the home in Christian Radio for 12 years (8 of those as a married woman). God did not bless my husband and I with children until we had been married for 8 years! I was 32-years-old before I became a mother for the first time.
We always thought that I would have to return to work even after having a baby. But, as soon as we saw that little "positive" sign on that test, we knew that I would quit my job and never return to the outside workforce again. God graciously granted my husband a new job just weeks before I gave birth to our oldest son that gave us just what we needed financially to meet our needs.
After being at home for a few weeks, my husband found me unusually quiet. (I'm not quiet by nature!) He asked me, "Aren't you happy at home? I thought this was what you wanted." I replied that it was what I wanted, but, I was unprepared for tasks that didn't get done or needed to be done (seemingly) just after you had gotten them done.
What I really liked about the workforce was the satisfaction of being given a project, planning it, executing it, and then sitting back and saying, "It sounds great--just like I envisioned it would." There wasn't a whole lot of that in motherhood--especially in the beginning.
I found that what I needed to do was cultivate a happy heart. I learned to give thanks while folding laundry. (Even after all these years I still smile while doing this task.) I would think about each family member while folding little socks and outfits. I gave thanks that all of our needs were met. I gave thanks for a warm house in the winter. I gave thanks for a husband who enjoyed his job and waited to come in the door and spend time with his wife and children in the evening. I gave thanks for a house that, although small, met our every need. I changed my perspective and my heart automatically followed suit.
Be optimistic - At one time I was so "bent" on saving every penny that we could, I drove my family insane for an entire year! I set a financial goal that was nearly unattainable to anyone of our income level. But, I was determined that it could be done. I would complain about a quarter here, a dime there, an extra car trip, anything that I considered unnecessary.
At the end of the year, we came within $400 of my goal. I was proud of myself. My family was just grateful that my year of "experimenting" with our tolerances was over. The problem? I was no longer trusting in God to meet our needs and stretch our resources. My optimistic spirit of thanks to God for every little blessing had diminished in my need to prove that I could make this "work."
Ladies, God will find it awfully difficult to bless you supernaturally if you are trying to make a budget "work" in your own strength. An optimistic spirit of believing that God has called you to be at home and He will meet your needs, will allow the windows of heaven to open and for blessings to fall in your home.
Practice meekness - I used to think of meek as a weak, but my husband has well described it as "strength under control." A meek woman does not need to "blow her own horn." She will let her gifts and talents flow and allow others to notice not her, but the fruits of her labor: the children who sit quietly in church, the home that is freshly picked up, the yard that is well kept.
I tell my children that we might not have the nicest kitchen floor in town - but at least it will be clean! If you have an atmosphere of love, acceptance, and hospitality in your home, then people won't notice that the furniture doesn't match or that they are eating off of plates that are three different patterns. Keep a smile on your face and show those around you a countenance of joy and love and they will want to keep coming back for more--and so will your husband and children!
Be enthusiastic! There is an old saying that "Enthusiasm Sells." Boy, is that the truth! Why else do you think that they have all those "satisfied customers" testify on infomercials? Because nothing sells a product like someone who is enthusiastic in their praise about performance, price, and the durability of any given product.
Well, ladies, enthusiasm sells in the realm of your home, too. My three-year-old recently told me that he doesn't like tomatoes. "Nonsense!" I exclaimed, "Look at that beautiful red tomato. Why God put an incredible powerhouse of disease fighting chemicals in every tomato. It is so sweet, so juicy, so tempting that you won't believe how wonderful it will taste."
You want to really hook him on the idea of eating it? Tell him, "Eat it and your body will fight off germs that try to get into it." Boys are seriously "into" the idea of conquering anything - including germs.
The next time you start to feel that your role as a homemaker really is making very little difference, just repeat after me. "Are you kidding? I am raising up a generation of warriors for Christ! I am loving a husband who is leading our family in the ways of the LORD. I am a woman who knows her place in Christ and is in love with being busy at home!"
-Hope has been married to Larry for nearly 20 years. They are both lifelong residents of Central Illinois and enjoy spending time together as a family. They are homeschooling three boys - ages 11, 9, and 3. Baby number 4 is due at the end of March. Hope enjoys cooking from scratch, budgeting, singing, and writing.
(Note from Crystal: If you would be interested in submitting a guest post, please email me for consideration.)
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Labels: Homemaking
posted by Crystal Paine at 4:00 PM
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