The last three days I had been feeling so exhausted, overwhelmed, and discouraged. I am nearing the end of my pregnancy and feel as if my body is starting to fall apart in addition to battling low hemoglobin levels which leave me with very little energy (my admiration continues to skyrocket for those of you who have many children!). My husband is in his second year of law school, and with the end of the semester upon us, he has been extremely busy preparing for finals. (In law school, finals are 100% of your grade.) He also has a huge project at work he has been laboring feverishly to finish. Our finances have been tight, and some larger bills are looming in the very near future. In the midst of this, both of our cars died, and one needed some pretty extensive (and, of course, expensive!) repairs.

Last night, I shared with my husband how I was feeling and asked him to pray with me that God would strengthen me and encourage me. I went to bed early and decided to read through a journal I had written during our courtship. How convicting! Three years ago, I would have given anything to be where I am now! I’m married to the man of my dreams and expecting a precious baby! Here I was getting all discouraged over these stresses in life and completely forgetting how blessed I am.

This morning, I checked my e-mail to find I had received a newsletter my single friend writes to encourage wives and mothers. What she wrote struck a deep chord with me and I wanted to share it with you:

Several weeks ago, God gave me a burden to pray about some things. Even though I do not know who my future marriage partner will be, I had some concerns, fears, and desires that I needed to bring before the Lord. Psalms 62:8 says, ‘…Pour out your heart before Him: God is a Refuge for us.’ I wrote the things that I prayed about down in my Diary and was going to keep them private. Then…I got to thinking that perhaps there are those of you who have had dreams of your marriage that have become somewhat foggy.

God is a fulfiller of dreams. I learned something from Catherine Marshall which was that the bigger and more impossible the dream, the bigger God seems when He fulfills it. Psalms 37:4 says ‘Delight thyself also in the Lord; and He shall give thee the desires of thine heart.’ I think that God might want a girl who has never been married, who looks at marriage with sparkling eyes and with prayers and dreams, to share her private prayers with you special women.

When and if I do get married, I don’t want to be passionately in love with my husband for the first year of our marriage and then gradually forget why I married him. I want to stay passionately in love with him.

Here are some of my prayers:

That our marriage will always be strong, vibrant, and passionate.
That I will always do special things for him.
That I will never forget to love him.
That our romantic flame will never grow any dimmer than it is the day we are married.
That my love for him will be strong and powerful.

Crystal Paine is a 24-year-old homeschool graduate from Topeka, Kansas. She is the blessed wife of Jesse and joyful mother of Kathrynne. Visit her site, Biblical Womanhood, for books, articles, encouragement, and inspiration!