This is why you should never blog about something unless you are sure it really and truly works
I've been lax in participating in Works-For-Me-Wednesday recently because, ahem, I haven't really felt like I have many new ideas. However, Shannon's hosting a What-Didn't-Work-For-Me Day in lieu of her usual fare so this should be easy!
There's a whole list of things I could talk about that don't work for me: trying to survive on less than six hours of sleep at night, cutting out chocolate, not drinking enough water, overloading my schedule, grocery shopping with two little children when everyone is tired and hungry...
Instead of elaborating on those, I'll 'fess up and tell you one of the biggest flops I've had in my short mothering tenure--my grand idea of doing the infant potty training thing.
Kudos to those of you who have successfully potty trained your six-month-olds but it didn't work for us.
There, I admitted it.
Kathrynne would faithfully go every time we put on her the toilet from the time she was a wee little thing but it all hinged on us actually remembering to take her. Which meant that in order for said girl to stay dry I had to dutifully take her every 30 minutes.
How is this scatter-brained momma who often can't even remember to brush her own teeth supposed to remember details like that?
Yeah, I guess the books on the whole Elimination Communication phenomenon skipped over the simple part of how you're supposed to teach your six-month-old to tell you they have to go.
I was embarrassed to admit this for awhile seeing as I'd blogged about it and all. (Note to self: forgo blogging about anything in the future until you are completely, absolutely, 100-percent-without-a-doubt sure that it actually works.) But I guess now is as good a time as ever to admit my over-achieving, first-time mom flop.
The good news is that after working at it for two and a half years, I am happy to report that aforementioned girl is now completely potty-trained and rarely needs a reminder from me.
Our second-born, Kaitlynn, is almost eleven months old and hasn't a clue what the toilet exists for. And I think we'll be keeping it that way for at least a little while longer. Two and a half years of potty-training one child just seems a little much to me. Gulp.
As a missionary, many people ask me what I see as my role in ministry. I'd like to share from Scripture and my experience concerning what I believe a married wife and mother's place in ministry should be.
First and foremost, I believe that, as wives, our primary role is one of support. As a wife, it is my primary focus to make sure that my home is an oasis for my hardworking husband, making sure he has good meals, clean clothes, and lots of encouragement. There is much more I'd like to say about this, but for this post I want to focus on the role of mothering.
As a mother, my role is to train my children in "the way they should go". The home should be a "training ground" in which I impart wisdom to my little ones by teaching them about God, His Word, and life.
"She speaks with wisdom and faithful instruction is on her tongue." Proverbs 31:26.
Where did we get the idea that to be a godly woman we must participate in all church activities, as well as lead as many of them as we possibly can? There's this idea that doing "ministry" can only take place outside the home, and that only "real" ministry can be done when the husband and kids are out of the way. Mothering these days is looked at as something to get through, or get away from so that we can do "real ministry".
Dear ladies, what are our children doing while we are out "doing" ministry, and who is watching them? God has given us such an important ministry! He's entrusted us with little souls who are searching for truth. What could be more important than that?
Yes, there is lots of ministry that we could be doing outside the home. But then, where would our precious children be? The only One we should be concerned with pleasing is the Lord. What is His plan for our lives in ministry? He is so clear: our first, our primary, our most important ministry, is right in our homes, training our little ones.
"...so that they may encourage the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, to be sensible, pure, workers at home, kind, being subject to their own husbands that the Word of God will not be dishonored." Titus 2:3-5.
This, as women, is our primary ministry and this is exactly what God has called us to. More than anything, I want this verse to be true in my life: "I have no greater joy than to hear that my children walk in truth." 3 John 1:4
So, if our primary role is mainly in the home, what can ministry to others look like? Let me just clarify that I am speaking mainly towards women with young children. Since that is the stage of life I am in, I could never speak to women older than I am or outside my stage of life.
First, before you think of expanding your realm of ministry in any capacity, you need to look around and ask yourself honestly, "Is my family cared for to the very best of my ability?" and "Is there something that I could be doing for them, that I'm not doing now?"
Whatever ideas you have about ministry need to be discussed with your husband first, and then prayed about to seek God's leading. So, what kind of ministry am I talking about?
First and foremost, wherever you go, whether it is to Wal-Mart or McDonald's, always seek to share the love of Christ. Make sure that you are the "sweet aroma of Christ" anywhere and everywhere you go!
Here are some simple ideas to get you started:
-Hospitality is a great area for the whole family to get involved. Invite your unsaved neighbors over for a meal. Here in Indonesia, I enjoy walking around with the kids and getting to know our neighbors. This has produced many wonderful friendships.
-Make sure friends and family know that they are welcome to drop in anytime, for a meal or for a night.
-Invite a single girl from church over to your home. She will feel honored and blessed by your invitation. Your house doesn't need to be spotless, you don't need to serve the best meal, just making your guests feel welcome and wanted is enough.
Find something that you and your children can do together to reach out to the community. Some simple ideas might include:
-Prepare a meal as a family, and take it to a sick friend, a new mom, or an elderly member of your church. The kids will think it's great fun to help mommy cook, and then to share their creation with others.
-If you are baking for your family, make extra. Then get the kids and all go together to deliver it to a friend. Why? Just for fun--the recipient is surprised and the kids think that it is great fun.
-Have your kids write special notes to elderly members of your church or local rest home and then deliver them. Notes from little ones will melt any heart.
Any of these things can greatly enhance your life, as well as the lives of your children. However, you need to make sure you keep it all in perspective. If you're making a casserole for the family down the road, but have nothing to feed your family, perhaps it's time to rethink your priorities.
-Joy is the proud wife of a missionary pilot, as well as the blessed mommy to five. She and her family live on the island of Tarakan in Indonesia, where they serve as missionaries. Joy has a passion to encourage women to find contentment in the "mission field" right inside their home--their family. You can visit Joy at her personal blog, Joy in the Journey.
I had the privilege of attending the MPE homeschool conference this weekend and what a blessing it was! I've been to numerous homeschool conferences before but this one was one of the most encouraging that I've attended in a long time.
As Kathrynne is nearing school age, I've been feeling more and more pressure to do more academics with her. This pressure was completely self-imposed but it was there nonetheless.
I went to the conference feeling somewhat burdened down by my need to figure out more clearly what curriculum and books I should be doing with Kathrynne and what direction we should be taking. It was overwhelming but I was determined to try and make some headway.
Why was I so concerned and uptight about academics? Yes, I want my daughters to have a high-quality education but are academics really what is most important to me? Shouldn't my focus instead be on instilling in my girls a heart for the Lord and training and discipling them in the ways of the Lord?
Here I was stressing over what math book Kathrynne should be doing when and how fast she should be progressing and I was completely overlooking the big picture of what home education is supposed to be all about--that of raising up our children in the nurture and admonition of the Lord to send them out as mighty warriors to impact this culture for the glory of God!
As I continued to listen to the sessions by Dr. Baucham, I was so encouraged and relieved; I don't have to try and do it all, I don't have to stress over curriculum and textbooks like this, my primary focus should instead be on loving the Lord, loving my family, discipling my daughters, and setting a Godly example before them.
I was struck with how misplaced my priorities have been. Instead of just loving and enjoying my girls, I've been worrying about academics and progress in the world's eyes. What does it matter what the world thinks of our family? If God is pleased, that's all that matters.
And so I begin this mothering and home-educating thing anew. Bring on the story books, the wagon rides, the ant-watching, and the beater-licking! There will be time enough in the future to cover textbooks and workbooks, today we're just going to enjoy learning from life together.
Related: Kendra's post on Beginning a Classical Education here was very encouraging to me as I seek to refocus my priorities.
Successful Homemaking with Toddlers: Is it Possible? Part 1
Because of a large number of requests and emails in recent weeks, I'm embarking on a series on successful homemaking with toddlers underfoot. I do not consider myself to be any expert on this subject; I only have two little girls and have been a mom for less than four years.
As always, I have much left to learn and, in ten years from now, I'll likely have a much different viewpoint. However, I hope that some of what I share will be an encouragement to those of you young moms who feel overwhelmed in your everyday tasks.
Successful homemaking with toddlers--is it possible?
Yes, it is... But only with God's help, lots of creativity and diligence on our part, and our willingness to let go of perfectionism.
You see, I believe that "successful homemaking" does not mean you have a perfect home, a perfect schedule, or perfect children. In fact, none of us will ever have any of those things at any time. We live in a sin-filled world full of imperfection. If we try to achieve perfection, we will always fail and, more than likely, we'll live in despair.
However, I do believe that God can equip us and enable us to be the wives, mothers, and homemakers He has called us to be. By His grace, we can joyfully and whole-heartedly fulfill our roles as help meets to our husbands, loving nurturers of our children, and diligent managers of our homes. And we can do all of this in a manner which brings glory and honor to the Lord!
Join me in the next two weeks as I share what God has been teaching me the last few years and practical ideas I've implemented in order to seek to successfully manage our home with young children.
Note: I'd love to have some guest posts on this topic, too--especially from those of you who are more seasoned moms. Email me if you're interested in sharing!
Sometimes it seems that Mommy Culture is particularly susceptible to all-or-nothing-ism. In our devotion to our particular pet causes and methods (many children or few, natural childbirth or not, breastfeeding or not, cloth diapers or disposable or potty training your newborn, sleep training or not, spanking or not, homeschooling or private school or public school, just to name a few from the endless list) it becomes increasingly difficult to be honest about the drawbacks or frustrations we're experiencing, as if by admitting we're having a rough time we are selling out our issue.
I do this all the time and I think it's unfortunate, because by glossing over my struggles and staying at a superficial level with people, I miss out on the wise counsel and perspective that other people can give.
Certainly I don't think we should all jump up and start complaining about everything or airing our dirty laundry to the world wide web. I think there is benefit to being cheerful and content whatever our circumstances. Sometimes it's very encouraging to read about someone who is really gutting it out with a commitment to something, as it gives me confidence to keep pressing on. However, sometimes it is nice to stumble across someone who can admit the downsides to something while still affirming the worthwhile nature of the cause in question.
Well said and advice I need to continue to work on heeding in my own life. I especially struggle with finding the balance between being real while also being encouraging as a blogger. I want to build up women in their callings while at the same time being open and honest about my struggles and weaknesses--which are many. But how to strike the balance? It's something I'm definitely still working on!
Do you struggle with this or something similar as well? If so, how have you learned to find a God-honoring balance in your life?
Do you buy baby food for your daughter or do you make it? When I see pictures of your shopping trips I do not see any foods that you could use to make baby food. I have two boys 8 and 3 and a baby girl 8 months. I was just curious. It seems like I am spending a lot on baby food these last couple of months. -Mandy
Great question, Mandy! Having only had two little children so far, I'm no expert when it comes to parenting, so I'll just share what we've done with our girls. Each child and family is different so please do what works best for your family. Here's what has worked for us:
1. I nurse exclusively for the first six months. For me, nursing is easy, simple, a great post-pregnancy weight-loss program, the best nourishment for my child, and it's free. (Well, it is unless you count all the extra food I consume while nursing!)
2. We start introducing a few foods here and there at around six months. This is normally in the form of just giving the child a couple of tastes of banana or vegetables a few times per week. I usually mash up something that I'm already eating and offer a few bites. Nursing continues like usual.
Kathrynne wasn't really interested in food until around a year so she didn't do much besides nurse and taste things here and there for the first year. Kaitlynn, on the other hand, is quite interested in food. However, she is still mostly nursing, while eating small amounts of table food a few times each day.
3. We start encouraging our children to eat small meals three times per day at around a year old. We stick with fruits, vegetables, and whole grains first and then gradually add in other foods. By this time, a child can easily eat soft table foods (or fruits/veggies mashed in the baby food grinder) so we'll just offer the child whatever fruit or veggies we're eating at a meal plus some homemade bread or other wholegrain finger foods.
As our child catches on to eating more, nursing is, in turn, gradually reduced to only 3-4 times per day (usually once in the morning, once in the afternoon, and once before bed) and will continue to be replaced more and more by table food over the next six to twelve months. (I weaned Kathrynne at 18 months, I plan to nurse Kaitlynn at least that long unless she weans herself sooner.)
I personally see store-bought baby food as one of the most overpriced items ever, so I don't buy it except on the rare occasion when I can get it for free. I've made baby food up ahead of time and frozen it in ice cubes before, but I found that didn't work very well for us. Now we pretty much just offer whatever foods we are already eating. Since I normally make homemade bread every few days and we eat a lot of fresh fruits and vegetables, it's quite simple to have something for the baby to eat from what we're already eating. I do recommend you invest in a simple baby food grinder (they are about $10) and then just make sure you plan fruits and vegetables into your menus that your baby can eat. If it's something which can't just be easily mashed with a fork, stick a small bit in the grinder when you sit down at the table, grind it up for them, and you're good to go!
So that's how we keep our babies nutritiously fed without spending a lot of extra money. I'd love to hear what works for others. Tell us about it in your Frugal Friday post this week or leave a comment!
--------------- Join in Frugal Friday! Have a tip, resource, idea, or thought related to frugality? Post about it on your blog and then come back here and share the link with us below. Remember to keep it family-friendly. Thanks for participating.
Thank you very much for your helpful ideas yesterday. You really blessed me with your wise, encouraging words and your sage advice.
Anyone who knows me, knows that I struggle with attempting to do too much and add too many things to my plate. I often seem to only have two speeds--running or completely shut down.
Motherhood has forced me to slow down and it's been a good thing. But this incident has reminded me just how much more I need to learn about taking seasons of rest when it is needed. I don't always have to be checking things off my to-do list or viewing quality in the form of accomplishment. I already know this in my head, but actually doing it is another thing altogether.
There's nothing like the complete inability to nourish your child as a great big flashing cue from the Lord that I needed to slow down and take it easy. And so, since I realized that getting my milk supply back wasn't something I could just schedule to do in three weeks, I overcame my "Martha" tendencies and took today off.
Completely off.
I did nothing besides eat, drink, nurse, snuggle with the girls, and read. Oh and I think I ran one load of laundry. And that's it.
Can I just say how much fulfillment there was in taking time to sit, smile, talk, laugh, and read lots of books with my girls without worrying about anything else?
My home isn't the cleanest, I'm behind on laundry, and I think we're having sandwiches for dinner, but I feel so refreshed and relaxed. Best of all, the lactation problem is improving.
Slowing down wasn't so hard after all. In fact, I'm thinking we ought to do this more often! I like the rhythm and order that our normal schedule brings to our home (and we'll be talking more about that later this week in our Finding Time series!), but sometimes I think we all need to step back and take time to just be still. At least I know I do. Graphic from All Posters
This is one of those "for females only" types of posts, so if you're one of my three male readers, consider yourself warned. Ahem.
For the rest of you ladies--especially those of you who have been or are nursing moms--I could use some help and input:
Have you ever experienced a dramatic decrease in milk supply as the result of sickness/high fever?
I'm sure I don't really need to explain why I'm asking this question, but yes, being miserably sick this weekend (I was more sick than I can remember being in years!) seems to have severely affected my milk supply. I'm guessing the high fever depleted my body and I also probably didn't drink enough--even though I tried to remember to drink as much as possible.
I could really use some suggestions, encouragement, or ideas as I've never had this happen before and I admit that I'm somewhat stressing over this. Or maybe more than somewhat. And I'm not normally a person to get easily stressed out about things.
So, help me out here, please: Has this happened to you before? Is this normal? What can I do to restore my milk supply?
Thanks for helping out this young mama who still needs to learn more than a thing or two about resting in the Lord!
I have no clue how to parent, teach, and train a three-year-old. No clue.
I've done the baby thing twice and both girls have survived so I guess the thought of having another baby or two or ten is really not too overwhelming to me (okay, I admit, the ten babies thing is rather mind-boggling!).
But then the babies grow up and become three-year-olds.
Raising three-year-olds? I really haven't the foggiest idea!
Everyday there seems to be a new adventure or challenge which brings me back on my knees before the Lord begging for wisdom and direction because I have none in and of myself and feel very inadequate to be parenting a three-year-old.
It hit me again last night. Kathrynne has been begging to do school and is quickly progressing through learning her letters and numbers. At the rate she's going, she very likely could be reading soon (though her enthusiasm could also die at any moment, too!).
As I pondered the thought of teaching a first-grader, I started panicking, "I don't know how to do this! What have I gotten myself into?!"
I realize anew just how much I need God's grace--everyday, every hour, every moment. Without His help, I'd have never made it this far. And somehow, He will carry me through parenting of three-year-olds, and thirteen-year-olds, and beyond.
Guest Post: Instilling organization in your children from an early age
Today is the last day to get the Bargain Ebook Package for $5! Be sure to get your copy here.Guest Post from Laura at Heavenly HomeMakers
As my husband and I work to raise our four sons, organization is a must. Now, I'm not talking about organizing their books on the shelf using the Dewey Decimal System or color coding their action figures in special containers. Hey, it's a good day at our house if they happen to be wearing clothes that match.
I'm talking about organizing/prioritizing what we most feel like they need to learn and do in order for them to become the godly men we desire for them to be.
We focus on three key elements in order that we as parents will be organized, and so that our children will learn organization for themselves.
School Work
House Work
Spiritual Training
While these are three separate elements, we really feel like they all go together and cannot truly be separated into actual categories. We want our boys to learn that all that they learn and do is for the glory of God.
Here are some specifics of how we organize our days and how we work to train our boys to learn to organize:
*We do most of our "sit-down" school work Monday through Thursday. I write a list for each boy in their individual assignment notebook. They know that these assignments must be done by the end of the week (and certainly before they ask to make any plans with friends on Saturday!). The boys then choose to organize their individual school work any way that works best for them (with direction from us if they need it, of course).
*Fridays are our cleaning days. I usually write one list on a marker board of all the housework the boys need to do for the day. They look at the list and organize it themselves into who will do what.
For instance, all if I have written on the list "Clean Bathrooms", they then discuss and decide who will clean the toilets, who will wash the sinks, who will sweep and who will mop. These discussions don't always go as pleasantly as one would hope, but usually they work everything out pretty well. It's kind of fun to listen to their corporate "who's gonna clean what" meeting!
*We have found that meal times are perfect for Biblical instruction. (It's about the only time these boys are sitting still and quiet all at the same time!) During breakfast, I read from the Bible to them. During lunch, we work on memorizing scripture. During dinner, Daddy usually takes over with more memory work. We also use our dinner time to tell Daddy all the things we did and learned for the day.
This has been a great way to reinforce lessons learned and godly behaviors. I like to "brag" to Daddy in front of the boys when I am particularly proud of something they have done. You should see the boys beam. Pleasing their daddy is very important to them.
Because my husband and I have taken the time to implement these fairly simple organizational elements, our boys have naturally learned to make plans and organize themselves as they get older. It's been a blessing to watch. We still have a long way to go, and it all goes back to "working to be organized." Training the kids towards better organization is a certainly a work in progress.
-Laura Coppinger has been married to Matt for 13 years and is mom of four boys ages 3-10. Visit her blog for more encouragement and practical homemaking ideas.
Have you gotten your Bargain Ebook Package yet? In it, you'll find great tips for making your kitchen more functional, ideas for making your kitchen more kid-friendly, and lots of delicious recipes using old-fashioned ingredients! It's only $5 for all 6 ebooks (plus some bonuses!) through tonight!
What about you? How do you help instill organization in your children? I'd love to hear your ideas and tips!
A few days ago, I was having a bad afternoon. Nothing was really wrong--except my attitude. I was feeling frazzled for no reason and it was the little things which were "getting to me" and causing me to be short and snippy with the girls.
Finally, Jesse walked in the door and I was never so glad to see him! And would you know what the first words were out of Kathrynne's mouth?
"Mama's soo beautiful!"
Say what, Kathrynne?
When I should have been snuggling, playing, laughing, and enjoying you and your sister, I was instead feeling frustrated and irritated. Despite this, you overlooked my bad attitude and exclaimed how beautiful you think I am!
Kathrynne's simple comment immediately convicted me of how ugly my attitude had been for the past hour. After repenting of it and thinking some more on her comment, this verse came to mind:
"...Verily I say unto you, Except ye be converted, and become as little children, ye shall not enter into the kingdom of heaven."
The next time someone else mistreats me or has a less-than-beautiful attitude towards me, I hope I remember to be like Kathrynne and overlook the ugliness and instead love this person and see them as beautiful.
And, isn't that a wonderful picture of Christ has done for me?
Passionate Housewives Desperate for God, will be featured on the FamilyLife Today broadcast on March 13-14, 2008. Hosted by Dennis Rainey and Bob Lepine, FamilyLife Today airs daily on more than 800 Christian radio outlets nationwide.
Home Sweet Home: The Center of Evangelism 03/13/08 (Day 1 of 2) Does motherhood leave you little time for ministry? If that's what you've thought, you might want to reconsider. On today's broadcast, Jennie Chancey and Stacy McDonald, co-authors of the book Passionate Housewives Desperate for God, tell Dennis Rainey how a woman's home can be her greatest outreach for the gospel, especially when she's training her children or reaching out to friends or neighbors.
Redefining Womanhood 03/14/08 (Day 2 of 2) Mother of eight, Jennie Chancey, and mother of ten, Stacy McDonald, join award-winning author and speaker Dennis Rainey for today's broadcast. Jennie and Stacy, co-authors of the book Passionate Housewives Desperate for God, encourage wives and mothers to remember their high calling and to look forward to the legacy they're leaving behind.
If you are unable to catch the broadcast, you can listen online here. If you get a chance to tune in, I'd love to hear what you think!
By the way, if you haven't gotten your copy of Passionate Housewives Desperate for God, I heartily encourage you to do so. This book inspired, blessed, and challenged this young mama to not "grow weary in well-doing" but rather to look to the Lord for the courage and strength to fulfill this noble and glorious calling He has called me to--that of wife, mother, and homemaker.
Though the world may scoff and accuse me of "wasting my life", I'm making my husband successful, training and nurturing the next generation, and seeking to beautifully depict the Gospel through our home and family. What could be greater than investing my life in those things?
"Few women realize what great service they are doing for mankind and for the kingdom of Christ when they pour their energies into maintaining a shelter for the family and nurturing their children--the foundation on which all else is built...No professional pursuit so uniquely combines the most menial tasks with the most meaningful opportunities."
"Be fruitful" isn't the trump verse of the Bible. If we were looking for the trump verse, it would have to be Jesus' words to love God and love our neighbor. He already told us the main thing. (Question to myself: How well am I doing that?) How can we avoid one verse becoming the measuring stick of the condition of our hearts and the vehicle in which churches and groups are built upon?
The woman who has trusted God for the timing and spacing of her children does well. She ought to be praised. Where she fails is when she tells others exactly how they ought to do the same: all birth control is a sin. (A married woman who has produced a child has multiplied technically, were it about technicalities and not loving obedience to a good God.) Saying this isn't postmodern, wherein one just picks out the verses they especially like and then tells everyone not to judge. The Bible doesn't bind our consciences in this way, and so we shouldn't do it to one another. We live with this tension all the time in Scripture. Circumstances don't dictate theology, but yet we all make judgments and decisions based upon them. Women in China--where they forcefully abort your second child--have to decide in wisdom how to apply Scripture's words.
If we believe that children are a blessing from God and that large families should be the norm, we need to act upon that belief regardless of whether we really think we're ready for the job. No excuses. Who among us is really ready and fully equipped to raise even one child? Can any of us really expect to succeed in this monumental task by our own strength and virtue?
Can you guarantee that you are patient enough to raise even one child? Do you think I was equipped to be the mother of this crowd when I was a newlywed? Do you think I'm the perfect model of saintly patience now?
Do you really have the financial stability to commit to providing for a child for 18 or more years? How do you know where your job or bank account will stand at this time next year? Are you sure you’ll even be alive next week?
Do you think pregnancy is always fun or easy for moms of many? Our hips and backs hurt too. Labor hurts, every time. We have gestational diabetes, ligament pain, fatigue, anemia, c-sections, morning sickness, children with handicaps, stillbirths and miscarriages. We do this joyfully because it is our service to the Lord, not because it sounds like fun.
I'm tempted to open up comments on this post because a lively discussion on a hot topic can be enlightening sometimes. But since I'm not suffering from a lack of things to do around here, I'll just encourage you to go read these posts and think this subject through Biblically.
And in case you're wondering where we stand on this: we believe children are a blessing from the Lord and we want to joyfully welcome as many gifts as God chooses to give us. That said, we don't consider ourselves "Quiverfull." That's not a term we've yet found in Scripture, so we prefer not to box ourselves in as such.
I also agree with Amy in that we need to be very careful not to hold up the number of children one has or doesn't have as evidence of one's Godliness and trust in the Lord--or their lack thereof. We all need to personally examine our own motives for why we believe what we believe and why we do what we do. If others come to different conclusions or practices in their own life, let's extend grace and Christian charity to them--even if we disagree. This is something I'm still learning myself.
Yesterday afternoon the girls and I bundled up and hopped into the van to brave the snow and cold for our weekly trip to the library.
As I was getting into the driver's seat Kathrynne exclaimed, "Mama, that's Daddy's seat!"
Thinking for another moment, she then inquired with a surprised voice, "Did you learn how to drive, Mama?"
She seemed quite amazed that I was behind the wheel--as if she'd completely forgotten about the hundreds of other times she'd ridden with me and the fact that we make this same trip to the library every week. I assured her that I've actually been driving just as long as her Daddy, had lots of practice, and she had nothing to worry about.
She appeared to accept this and rode in silence for the short trip to the library. However, she must have been a bit worried for as we pulled into the library parking lot, she let out a sigh of relief and exclaimed, "There's the library--Praise the Lord!"
I don't think I've ever been more excited about such a small thing
After almost four months of working on it, Kaitlynn's first tooth finally popped through today. My immediate response upon discovering this? A loud whoop and holler and exultant exclamations of "Praise the Lord!"
Yes, folks, I know it might sound like a little exaggerated excitement going on here over the first sighting of Kaitlynn's pearly whites, but if you had lived in this home for the last few months you'd be shouting "Glory! Hallelujah!" along with the rest of us!
I'm not kidding you; I never knew such a tiny thing could create so much pain, so much lost sleep (for both mom and dad and baby!), and require so much Tylenol and Motrin.
Let's hope that the rest of her teeth arrive in a much-smoother fashion. Otherwise, my hair might match the color of her teeth before she even starts working on getting her two-year-old molars.
In stark contrast to her sister, this girl *loves* food of all types
Kaitlynn tastes her first orange
Approximately 2 minutes later
Yummy! I like oranges, Mama!
In the past two weeks, Kaitlynn has become completely mobile doing this scoot-crawl maneuver to get wherever she wants to go. And she's especially fast when the end goal is food! Completely opposite to her sister, she has instantly taken a great liking to food and constantly is begging for more. We're trying to take it slowly, much to her chagrin. At the rate she's going, I think she'll wean herself before too long.
She is also "talking" a lot more and just this week learned to clap and play peek-a-boo. We're now starting to teach her some basic signs. I can hardly believe she'll be eight months in just two short weeks!
The women who came over on ships, lurching, tossing ships. Those strong women who bore pregnancy and even gave birth on those rollicking boats, while traveling to a new land. Those brave, wonderful women who had babies, and many. Because those babies were their future. Those babies were their livelihood. Those babies were the key to success in stocking a brand-new nation with brand-new people.
I tip my hat to those women who stayed in their homes, tended those humble little vegetable gardens. Who coaxed life and food out of the stubborn soil. The ones who bent their backs and leathered their faces by the fire, to feed hard-working families. Determined families. Those courageous ones, who pooled their food to feed new families arriving on new ships, always more ships. Those brave souls who had faith. So much faith.
I tip my hat to those women who never gave up. Who buried their little ones in the ground, far from family at home, who had to dry their tears and keep on working and living. Because their very lives, and very many other lives depended on them. I salute them for their strength.
"You can never regret any amount of labor you have expended, any sacrifices you have made, any sufferings you have undergone, to train up your children to be with you the heirs of a glorious immortality. O there is enough, abundantly enough, to encourage every parent to unwearied exertions!"
Voddie Baucham: "Christians will not win the culture war until they remove their children from Government Schools."
(This post was supposed to be This Week in Books: Week 3 - I kind of got long-winded in the first review, though!)
Jesse and I watched the two-DVD set, The Children of Caeser by Dr. Voddie Baucham this past Sunday. Like we have found all of his materials to be, these messages were thought-provoking and Scripturally-sound.
Dr. Baucham's thesis is that Christians will not win the culture war until they remove their children from Government Schools. I know this is a touchy subject and I've made a lot of folks upset in the past with how dogmatic I am that Christians should have no part in the government school system. However, I would challenge any Christian to give me a Scriptural basis for sending young children away from their parents for eight or more hours a day to be indoctrinated by a system which is anti-God. You can search the Scriptures high and low, but it isn't there.
If we don't have a Biblical basis for why we do what we do, how can we call ourselves Christ-followers? As parents, it is our responsibility before God to train up our children. We are called by God to shape their world view. How can we do this in our children's formative years if we are barely even spending any quality time with them at all? Devoid of parental involvement and oversight, peers, humanistic teachers, the media and modern entertainment industry, and a variety of other forces will gladly take our place.
I know that those last two paragraphs were really strong, maybe blatantly over-the-top strong for some of you. Please know that it is not my intent to offend, but to really encourage you to think Biblically, to use Scripture as your Guide for all of life and practice.
And lest you homeschoolers think you get off the hook in this post, let me say a few words to you: It is not enough for us to just pull our children out of the public school system or to remove wrong influences. No, we need to be filling our children's lives with the good, the wholesome, the God-honoring.
Sometimes I think we become complacent in thinking that as long as we avoid humanistic philosophies or corrupt peers, our children will be okay. We wrongfully assume that being a homeschooler means our children will automatically turn out alright.
I've been around homeschoolers long enough to know it doesn't work that way.
As parents we must be ever vigilant. We must constantly be praying for our children, constantly modeling a God-honoring life before them, constantly pouring into them God's Truths, and most of all, to be raising our children to be Godly adults.
My goal as a parent is to work myself out of a job. I want to raise my children up to submit to my authority so that they learn, at an early age, to submit to God's Authority. I want to train them to make wise decisions now with my guidance so that someday they will look to the Lord for guidance.
Jesse and I pray without ceasing that our girls would love the Lord with all of their hearts. Yes, we want to protect them from the evils of the world. Yes, we want them to be pure. Yes, we want them to be wise and discerning. Yes, we want to see them succeed in life.
But all of that is not enough - all that is meaningless, in fact - if they do not love the Lord with all their hearts. Homeschooled or public schooled, it really doesn't matter in the grand scheme of things, if they are not sold-out, impassioned soldiers of the Cross of Christ.
And so yes, we feel very strongly that God has called us to homeschool our children, but it goes so much deeper than academic education. We are called to train up these precious little ones that God has given us to be shot out as well-equipped arrows - to pierce through the sin and darkness of this world, to mightily impact our culture for the glory of God.
Related: If you are unfamiliar with Voddie Baucham, I highly encourage you to listen to this sermon and also, if possible, to buy a copy of his book, Family Driven Faith. It was by far one of the best books I read in 2007.
Also finished this week:
Healthy Habits - 20 simple ways to healthier living. Simple ideas and a quick read. I was challenged to make more of an effort to cut back on sugar consumption.
Sweet and Sugar-Free An All-Natural Fruit-Sweetened Dessert Cookbook - Lots of great-looking recipes, some which I've added to my list to try soon. Definitely worth checking out if you have a sweet-tooth but are hoping to cut back on sugar.
Exodus - I am so enjoying reading straight through the Bible again! And reading around 4 chapters per day seems to be the perfect length. I have been amazed, once again, at just how normal the heroes of the Bible are - falling into sin, struggling again and again - and yet God used these very human people for His great glory!
[Note: I'm closing comments to this post because I know this is a hot topic and I don't have the time or desire to moderate a debate on the subject right now. I do encourage you to examine your own life and your own family's decisions and actions in light of Scripture, as this DVD series has caused me to do. Feel free to email me privately if you have any comments.]
You've melted our hearts, you've showed us depths of love we didn't know we were capable of, you've taught us in a brand-new way just how much our Heavenly Father loves us.
Being a mom has been the most wonderful experience and the hardest experience all wrapped up in one. Seeing you grow, seeing you mature, seeing you learn to obey, hearing you say "I love you, Mama." Those memories are one of the most precious and priceless ever to a mother.
You keep us laughing with your crazy antics. We just never know what a day might hold with you around.
You've grown into such a big helper and you bless me everyday by going out of your way to share your toys and special treats with us. You are proving yourself faithful in the little things and someday I trust God will allow you to be faithful with much.
Thank you for your heart to serve and give -- especially to your little sister. Your tenderness and compassion towards her often brings tears to my eyes.
The weight of responsibility to train and raise you in the ways of the Lord is sometimes overwhelming. You've stretched me beyond what I thought I was capable of and taught me more about self-sacrifice than I've ever known. The sleepless nights, the tiredness, the messes, those all pale when I look into your eyes and see you smile. Or when you look up at me and say, "Hey Mama, you're butiful." And when you come and tell me that you want to love Jesus with all of your heart, I know that it's all worth it.
Happy Birthday, my precious Kathrynne. I'm privileged to be your Mama and I pray everyday that you may continue to grow in grace and in the knowledge of the Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ, that, as your name means, you would be a pure vessel to bring glory to the Lord with your life.
On a day which marks the tragic legalization of abortion, I wanted end on a positive note and share two beautiful testimonies of mothers who chose life. I've posted both of these before, but they are so touching that I wanted to share them again. Whether or not you've seen them before, I encourage you to take time to read the first story and then watch the video.
In Memory of the Woman Who Chose Life
Forty years ago, a very courageous woman chose not to abort her baby.
Unlike many unwed mothers, this woman had been previously married. She had born sons and daughters. She had helped to raise a family. But now in her forties she found herself divorced and with child - the fruit of a brief immoral relationship.
If she was like other unwed mothers facing the challenges and stigma of an unplanned and unwanted pregnancy, she probably suffered from fear and disappointment. And I can only imagine the pressure she felt to try to erase the embarrassment, to end the physical discomfort, and to avert the potential shame and rejection she would experience as she faced her own legitimate children and extended family with the news that their mother had conceived a child with a married man.
I am constantly amazed at the creativity of a two-and-a-half-year-old
I had to share a funny story that happened this morning, but first I have to give you a little background...
My parents gave us all of our old home movies on DVD for Christmas and Kathrynne has just loved watching these movies of when my siblings and I were little. She especially loves the one which has movies of when my brother, Dustin, was a baby. She's fondly dubbed that DVD the "movie of Dustin" and frequently requests to watch it.
Now, on to the story...
The past two days have been sort of helter-skelter and, as a result, we've not followed our schedule very well. I woke up and resolved this morning that we wouldn't deviate from it today and proceeded to tell Kathrynne excitedly that today we were getting back on the schedule.
She's taken quite a liking to this schedule thing and asks me throughout the day what is next on her schedule to do. She's usually really happy to follow whatever I tell her.
But today, instead of cheerfully following the schedule like usual, she decided she really, really wanted to watch that "movie of Dustin". Determined to not get off track, I explained to her that it wasn't on the schedule right now and told her instead it was time for her to do her tracing sheets.
She enjoyed those for awhile but then came back and asked again if she could watch the movie of Dustin. I again calmly explained wasn't on the schedule and told her she could watch the reading video in just a few moments as that was next on the schedule.
She then looked at me inquisitively and said, "Where's the schedule, Mama?" I motioned to where it was on the table, not thinking where this would be leading. Next thing I knew, she had pulled up a chair, and pen in hand was crossing things off the schedule print out, just like I do everyday.
After a few moments she looked up and said, "There it is, Mama. See right there."
She proceeded to point very specifically on the next time block and pronounced, "It says right there to watch the movie of Dustin."
Props for creativity in getting your own way, my daughter, but you forgot that Mama can read!
Many months ago, I tried to follow Catherine's example and start doing a "This Week in Books" series. With complications in my pregnancy and then having a newborn, I fell woefully behind on all reading so I abandoned my great intentions.
With none of the above excuses now, I am embarking again on this series of highlighting and posting short reviews of what books I read each week. I might also throw in some family-friendly movie reviews every now and then or children's books we've read, or any other types of media our family finds wholesome that week.
This week I read through two books - both which I'm excited to tell you about:
Deceptively Delicious - This cookbook doesn't really count for much actual reading but I wanted to mention it anyway since I enjoyed it so much. Though I'm not fond of the name (deceiving anyone - even for the sake of getting them to consume vegetables - is not God-honoring) and there's some psycho-babble parenting stuff you'll need to wade through, this book is packed with great recipes and inspiration.
The premise of the book is to hide various vegetable purees in everyday foods that your children like and readily - muffins, pancakes, brownies, etc. - and thus boost their nutritional value. Most of the recipes looked not only appetizing, but also quite good for you. I'd probably adjust them somewhat since I'm more a believer in the full-fat, whole-foods approach (ala Nourishing Traditions), but the recipes would be very easy to adjust.
Most of all, this book provided inspiration to an already-experimental cook. I wouldn't have ever thought to put pureed beets in pancake batter and make pink pancakes but you bet I'll be trying that now. Or, pureed spinach in brownies? I'm also game.
And since I have a knack for finding produce markdowns, my brain is spinning at how I can buy them all up at rock-bottom prices, fill up my freezer with purees, and get way more nutrition into myself and my family than I ever thought about before!
The Busy Mom's Guide to Simple Living - I think I've been living under a rock or something, but I've never seen or heard of this excellent book until I stumbled across it at our local library. I snatched it up and was ever so glad I did! Brimming with wisdom, advice, ideas, and much food for thought, this homeschool mother of seven covers a whole lot of ground in this simple little volume.
I was inspired, challenged, convicted, and motivated. I appreciated Jackie's home organization ideas, her heart for ministering to others on a limited budget, her humility and realness, her sage advice to keep it simple and focus on the most important things in life, and her simplistic ideas for baby-stepping your way to better nutrition.
Like usual, I didn't agree 100% with everything she said and some of the financial information was outdated, but the overall message of this book is timeless. I especially enjoyed all of the resources and books the author recommended; I added a bunch of them to my ever-growing to-read list.
For any mother who feels like she wants to improve as a family nutritionist and home economist, who would like to be stretched in her thinking as far as necessities go, or who could just use some home management ideas, this book is definitely worth your time.
What have you been reading recently? Any must-read recommendations for me?
I am having my second child in a few months. When he or she is born, my older child will be twenty months old. I am curious what your sleeping arrangements are for your girls. Do they share a room? If so, did that take some adjustment on Kathrynne's part when Kaitlynn moved in? Do you have any advice for getting two young children to take one nap a day at the same time? - Melissa
In answer your first question: We sort of have "evolving" sleeping arrangements right now. We had Kaitlynn in our room and Kathrynne in her own room but Kaitlynn was having trouble sleeping in our room, especially during naptimes, since Kathrynne or I would inadvertently need to retrieve something out of that room. She's a rather light sleeper and any noise or movement usually wakes her up. So, we now moved Kaitlynn's bed into Jesse's office and she's been sleeping in there. It's probably a temporary set-up, but it is working well right now.
We have the luxury of having space to put them in separate rooms, so I've not even tried having them in the same room. Knowing the way that they both sleep, I'm guessing neither one would sleep very well. We eventually plan to move them into the same room, but that will likely not be for another six months to a year.
To answer your second question: Yes, both girls do take naps at the same time in the afternoon. Having this time of quiet in the afternoon where I can accomplish some focused projects or rest myself has been a real blessing to me.
I'm not an experienced mom, but I think the greatest help in accomplishing dual naptimes/quiet times was the result of instilling this in Kathrynne before Kaitlynn was born. Every afternoon, for two hours, I put her in her play yard, gave her a few toys and books, and told her to rest. Most of the time, she would go to sleep, but if not, she'd stay in her bed and play quietly with toys or read.
After Kaitlynn was born, I started putting them both down at the same time in the afternoon. I make sure that their needs are taken care of and then just put them down and tell them quietly it's naptime. With a little bit of training, they both sleep for at least 2 hours every afternoon.
By the way, I first heard of the idea of two-hour afternoon quiet time from Jennie Chancey. I highly recommend you read her great advice and counsel on this and other practical mothering questions here.
Those are just a few of my thoughts and what has worked for us. I'd love to hear from other moms on this: What are the sleeping arrangements for the littles at your house like? Do you have any advice for getting children to nap at the same time?
Well, isn't this just how life works sometimes? The day I mention our schedule and some of you comment about how nice it is to have little ones napping in the afternoon is the day that bothgirls go on a napping strike.
Finally, out of desperation, I pulled out the playdough. And this is now how my kitchen floor looks: Gratefully, we did somehow manage to finish everything on the schedule, I just didn't get my usual hour or two of afternoon quiet time. Oh well, flexibility is what mothering is all about, isn't it?
And my little helper-in-training and soon-to-be left arm.
Have I mentioned lately how much I love being a mom? Having two has really been so much fun. To see them playing together, interacting, loving on one another, to hear Kathrynne teaching her little sister things I've taught her, to have Kathrynne constantly offering to help take care of her sister for me... I am truly blessed.
I might not always get a full night's sleep and my house might always be a little messy (or a little more than a little messy!), but that's okay. I'm blessed beyond measure to be given these two precious gifts from the Lord to train and raise for His glory. Oh, may I be faithful!
. It was by far one of the best books I read in 2007.
